Wendy's Bootcamp Journal

August 21, 2010

2010-08-21T21:28:00.002-04:00

Yes, once again, I confess it has been too long since my last blogging entry. And once again, I will try to commit to sitting here and writing about what's going on in my journey.

Since the last time I blogged, many things have happened. I passed my NESTA certification for Personal Training and took a job with Grand Rapids Adventure Boot Camp. About a month after I started training, I found out I had to have surgery. During recovery, I have not been able to use my body as I would like and I miss exercising regularly. I have an appointment with my surgeon this coming Wed. and I hope to be given the "all clear" then.

During my time of healing, I was not able to run, lift weights, or do pretty much anything that brought my heart rate up. I did have some time to relax and reflect which was nice but found out quickly why I need my morning exercise. My depression returned after a few days home without exercise. I need to move to feel good.

I did return to training a couple weeks ago and have gradually been adding back exercises for me little by little.

I have put on a couple pounds since I've not been my normal, active self but am trying not to fret over it. I know once I get moving again, the pounds will slide right off!

It's a NEW DAY

2010-03-02T10:29:00.003-05:00

Been on blogging hiatus for a while so I figured I better get my fingers typing again and update some people on my progress.

I will be blogging again regularly on my health and fitness journey.

In case you were wondering, YES! I am still doing Grand Rapids Adventure Boot Camp. No! I still have not missed a day since I started 8 months ago.

The past 8 months have been incredible for so many reasons. I have found joy and motivation in myself that I never knew existed.

My body is still under construction but I believe that I am now in the best physical shape of my life. I have been able to achieve many goals that I never even would have reached for 8 months ago.

I have not only developed physical strength. I have developed the mental strength and persistence to keep going and to deal with daily challenges and stresses that, in the past, would have knocked me down and led me to believe that the only way to deal was to reach for whatever vice was closest.

I am not saying that I do not struggle with anything anymore because I do, but it's much easier for me to face struggles that come knowing that I have the strength to overcome the obstacles in my way.

This morning was a beautiful, crisp snowy morning. The sun was gleaming. I went for a run. I ran PAIN-FREE. My knees were not hurting. My feet were not hurting. My hips, not hurting. Running is still not natural for me. I have not developed a love for it. But I ran PAIN-FREE today. It felt truly amazing!!! I have shed physical pounds during this journey but the unbearable weight that I carried on my shoulders for so many years is gone. I can't describe the liberation that I feel knowing that I AM STRONG. I AM FREE. I AM the Woman that I WANT to be, not the woman that I always thought I HAD to be.

I am learning and growing every day. I have just started the process of getting certified as a Fitness Trainer.

Many women and girls carry that "weight" on their shoulders and I want so badly to help them find what they need to do to let it go. The fatal cycle of depression and anger, binging and guilt was controlling my life. I want to help others see that it is possible to break that cycle and to find hope in reconciling their body to the state that God designed for their unique purpose. I want them to know that what society says about women's bodies is WRONG and that God never intended for us to carry around shame and self-hate because of an expectation that was not even originally set by Him.

I am still learning to love the body that God created me with. Daily, I remind myself to let go of un-obtainable expectations. I do set goals for myself, though and am learning to take pride in the accomplishments that I am able to achieve.

That's enough for today, next time I'll update you on Boot Camp and what's going on in class.

Session 3 FitPar Final Assessment

2009-09-03T07:36:00.002-04:00

Last night, I was determined to get in bed by 11 so I could be well-rested this morning for FitPar. At 11:24, I tucked myself in, tossed and turned just a little bit, but was probably asleep by about midnight. So I did get a full five hours but next time, I'm going to aim for an in-bed- time of 10 so that I can be to sleep by 11. I guess we'll see how that works out.

This morning, I got up and got myself ready. My stomach wasn't feeling the best so I did grab a protein bar on the way out the door but only took one bite of it for fear that if I ate any more, I might have had to deal with a little "surprise" during or at the end of my mile.

When I arrived at the park, we started with some stretching and a quickie warm-up. We headed over to the start of the mile for Dips. I was happy that I beat my last Dips score but still had a bit of queasiness going on in my stomach which I'm sure was magnified by the nervousness I feel every time I consciously try to break a personal best time score. Before I knew it, we were off. I borrowed a friend's IPOD today and the music selection was great! I started out at a slightly faster pace than I have before and I felt really good until I was a bit over half way there and then I realized that I was slowing down just a bit. I tried to maintain a strong pace but my usual sprint over the bridge was definitely harder and slower this time. During that last home-stretch, my heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest at any second. As I crossed the finish line, Rob called out my time. 7:57!!! I had done it!!! I was so excited!!! I punched my fists up in the air knowing that I had broken my personal best time record and had gotten my mile under 8 minutes. Pride for what MY body had just accomplished overwhelmed me with a wave of other emotions. Excitement, strength, thankfulness, maybe a little bit of dis-belief... I think I even felt tears welling up in my smiling eyes. Again, it's not anywhere near a "great time" for a "runner" but for me, under 8 minutes is something I never believed that I would be able to achieve. In just three months, I'VE been able to knock off almost 3 1/2 minutes. To ME, that is something that I can be proud FOR ME.

The biggest reason I share that is to give encouragement. I hope whoever is reading this understands that it's not about the "time". IT REAALLLLY ISN'T!!! For some, a Mile time of 5 minutes isn't fast enough and for some a Mile time of 20 minutes is AMAZING!!!!! For some, just being able to complete a mile is a huge personal success!!!!! Boot Camp has given me chances to make and meet personal goals. Not compare myself to others. It's important for me to be able to have "personal bests" because it helps me gauge the physical strength and endurance of my own body. I know that in the past, I have not always taken care of it and every time I achieve a new personal best, it makes me feel good because I know that I am moving closer to the Wendy Design that God had in the original plans for my own body. I know that God created my body to move because when I move, I feel good (physically and mentally) and when I am lazy and lethargic, I feel bad. For ME, the acceptance of that one fact has been a HUGE mind-shift and has given me a better understanding of how to deal with me. Again, I'm talking about ME.

OK, so I'm stepping down off the soapbox now.

Here are my scores for FitPar:

(old scores in red, new scores in blue)

1 Mile
8:04 7:57

25's (Ammo Can Lifts)
49 45 (Hmmm, went down just a bit, maybe because we did push-ups first?)

Bench Dips
43 47

Crunches
103 105

Front Plank
3:30 3:45

*I do admit it. There was a little bit of competition going on with this one today. Thanks, Amy!

Push Ups
36 47 (not too shabby!)

Reverse Crunches
71 68 (Eh, down 3, prob. shouldn't have rested in the middle.)

Split Squats
56 70 (I can still feel the nagging behind my heel every time I do this one...)

Suicide Shuttle
17 seconds 16 seconds

I'm excited for tomorrow and a little sad that it's my last day of this session. It seems like this month has gone so fast. I'm trying not to be anxious about next week. I'm determined to work out every day, I'm just not sure what company I will or will not have. I have signed up for September and am planning on continuing with my 5-day a week Boot Camp schedule. I'm already excited for the next session and I'm looking forward to new challenges and personal goals.

Again, if you're reading this, even if you can't join "Grand Rapids Adventure Boot Camp", treat your body and your mind to the gift of excersise. Yes, I did call it a "gift". You'll probably have to make some sacrifices (some may be small, some may seem really BIG) along the way but they will seem trivial down the road when you compare what you've given up to what you've gained. I promise!!!

I already know you can do it. Now we just need to convince you...

Believe it!!!!!!!

Yes, I know, I haven't kept up with my daily blog. I'm sorry :-(

2009-09-02T07:37:00.003-04:00

So I've been busy. Not just something here and there on the weekend busy but the kind of busy where every waking hour of every day is scheduled. I can't wait until next week because the boys will be back to school and I'll be back to a semi-normal schedule. So again, I apologize to those of you who do read my blog and I'll try to at least do updates a couple times a week starting next week.

So we're in our last week of this session and it has literally flown!!! I'm still feeling great and still look forward to every morning's challenge. We've been busy at Boot Camp. We've done TRX training, traveling, new circuits and today was Bring-A-Friend day.

I am feeling like Boot Camp is part of my every day life and schedule now. I do have to be careful, though because I've been catching myself not giving 100% on every single task lately and I know that the only person that loses in that is me.

Tomorrow is our FitPar assessment and I am ready for it. I hope to get a full 7 hours of sleep tonight and my biggest goal for tomorrow is to get my mile under 8 minutes.

I have been training in running a bit more intense on the weekends because I have a few events that I am participating in soon. I have an Alzheimer's walk in September, a 5K and (drum roll, please...) a half-marathon in October. I am excited about these events but I am very nervous about the half-marathon. I am not planning on running the whole 13 Miles, I'm sure I'll have to walk some of it. Last weekend, I did manage to do 8 Miles with a small amount of walking and I averaged about 12 minutes a mile. This weekend, I am going to do another long run and try to maintain a more steady pace. Please pray for 3 things for me. First, that I may be able to finish strong in the half-marathon (even if that means walking some). Second, that I can avoid injury and re-injury throughout the training process and during the events. And third, that I might be able to focus more on healthy food choices as I still struggle daily with what I am fueling my body with (especially when the days get stressful).

Next week is our week between sessions and I know that there are at least a few of us that are going to continue to meet (and we are open to joiners if you wish). I am hopeful that we can push ourselves to keep up the intensity and to meet daily.

I will try to update more frequently next week. As for now, I'm off to hit the showers and head out to another slammed day at the salon!

R3 Week 2

2009-08-18T07:08:00.003-04:00

So daily blog-readers, again, I apologize for neglecting my daily writing duties. I've had a more than overflowing plate the past few weeks and somehow my blog has been one of the things that I just can't seem to get to on a daily basis. But here's the summary of the past few days:

Last Thursday was our Fit Par assessment and I did overall pretty well. I improved on a few things, maintained on a few things and lost a little bit on a few things. Rob changed the format a little bit so I wasn't able to completely gauge how much or little improvement I've had in certain areas but I am happy to report that my mile time was 8:04!!!!! And that's my best time as of yet!!! My new goal will be to make it under 8 minutes so if I can knock just another 5 seconds off, I'll be there.

Here are my assessment scores:

1 Mile
8:04
*That's 32 seconds off my last time and 3:19 seconds off my original Mile time!!! Yeah :-)

25's (something new for assessments, lifting 25 lb. ammo boxes above our heads) 49

Bench Dips
43
*I stayed the same on this one

Crunches
103
*improved by 2

Front Plank
3:31
*lost four seconds (Hmm, I guess I'll shoot for 3:45 next time around.)

Push Ups
36
*improved by 2

Reverse Crunches
71
*lost 3

Split Squats (also new for FitPar)
56

Suicide Shuttle (new)
17 seconds

This week, we've had 2 really challenging workouts so far and I'm looking forward to the rest of the week to see what's ahead. Yesterday morning was a little tough to get moving because I did not work out on Saturday. This morning, it was extremely humid after the rain and we worked out in the covered parking lot which is definitely not my favorite place to be but I made it though and I feel great! Intensity Levels have been consistent and I would say between the 8.8-9.3 range which is really good.

I am continuing to feel better about myself everyday. I am not using the scale on a daily basis and there are even weeks that I do not weigh myself. I know that I can finally say that it really isn't about a "weight issue" anymore but about how using my body as it was designed makes me feel. And more often lately, I'm feeling strong, accomplished and confident. I'm facing life's challenges head-on and with open arms instead of cowering from them under the covers. I am learning to be transparent with people regardless of how I think they may feel about me because of it. I really do feel like this has now become part of my daily routine but I must honestly admit that even after 2 consistent months, I still have mornings that if it weren't for the accountability that Boot Camp provides, I probably would stay in bed.

So, I continue to keep my "Boot Camp Envelope" and fill it with my little "extra" dollars and cents any chance I get (even though there doesn't seem to be as much extra lately). Every time I get the urge to stop at Starbucks or somewhere else for a "treat" or see a pair of shoes that I "need" (want), I stop, take a deep breath and think about how I felt after that morning's session and why I need to make Boot Camp my indulgence and 95% of the time, I keep right on moving without looking back. (Hey, no one is perfect 100% of the time and Starbucks has a way of knowing just how to tempt me in my weakest moments...)

I keep moving forward and pressing on every day even though I have struggles. Boot Camp hasn't solved life's problems for me. Being "more fit" hasn't made me immune to life's challenges. But every single morning, I use the God-given blessing of that 1 hour of "me time" to the fullest!!! And when I'm driving home, 100% of the time, I genuinely feel better and more equipped to deal with the day's trials, tasks, and challenges. And I guarantee that there's NO "happy pill" out there that can boast those results!!!

Round 3 Here We Go

2009-08-11T17:40:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I was informed today that there are people still reading this thing so I guess I have to keep it up. My hope is that it will continue to encourage and motivate you.

So last week (the week between sessions), I was able to keep up workouts every day. I was planning on running on Saturday but we had some torrential down pouring rain so I didn't make it out. Sunday, we had plans pretty much all day so I took Sunday off too. I did feel tired and missed the workouts but it was nice to have a few days to relax.

Sunday evening, we had our pre-Boot Camp physical measurements and assessments. I am happy to report that I am still on track and improving in inches, flexibility and strength. I was also pleasantly surprised to find out that I had dropped a few pounds this time. I realize now that the pounds really do not matter in the grand scheme of things but still, it was nice to see a number that reflected a change.

Monday morning, again, there were downpours and storms and I woke up a few minutes too late. I arrived 5 minutes late for my first day but just in time to start warm-ups. We warmed up for a few minutes before heading into a circuit filled with resistance band pushes and pulls, step-ups, jump-ropes, mountain climbers, push ups, shuttles and crunches. We moved on to some weights and abs before finishing with some stretching.

I was given a new set of 10 lb. weights by two of the other campers that worked out with me last week. Katherine and Amy said it was because I worked out with them but honestly, I would have been there regardless and they helped push me to run faster than I probably would've if they wouldn't have been there. It was truly an unexpected surprise but so nice of them to think of me. And it was truly something that I had been wanting to purchase but didn't have the extra funds for, a need met without even an ask. Thanks, Guys!!!

Anyway, back to the blog, I was pretty physically tired and noticed that some of the things that would typically not be a problem for me were draining. I'm not sure if it was that I took those two days off or that I had lacked in sleep over the weekend but I definitely could have worked a bit harder so I made a commitment to do better the rest of the week and arrive on time and ready to push myself.

Intensity Level : 7.5

Last night, I got in bed on time and this morning, I got out of bed as soon as the alarm went off. I had a small breakfast and was able to enjoy a few minutes of quiet solitude and reflection before heading out the door. That is something that I need to take more time for daily. I arrived on time and glanced around. There were several new faces that I hadn't seen before. The first week is always a good week to get to know who will be good for motivating me and who I might want to avoid when working out. I find myself striving to keep pace with those who are physically a bit stronger/faster than me because it gives me a goal to work towards.

After we did a light warm-up, we did a partner jogging circuit with pit-stops for soldier kicks, jumping jacks, switch jumps (I forgot what they're really called), squats and cross knee-ups. After we finished that, we had time for a quick drink and to catch our breath before beginning the next circuit. We were paired up and headed out to do push ups, dips, hoop-jacks, skater squats, sissy squats, body bar lifts, res. pushes and pulls. The first time through, we did the circuit with a partner. The second time through, by ourselves, at our own pace. I resolved to push myself today and I did. I completed every rep asked of me, I focused on accuracy of form and maximum resistance levels on all tasks. I felt strong today and other than a tiny bit of nagging from my foot, I finished with relatively no struggles (I didn't say it was easy, just no added struggles...).

Today's Intensity Level : 8-9 (varied at different times)

I'm looking forward to tomorrow and the rest of the week. I'm looking ahead to Thursday for my Fit Par test so that I can set new goals for this round. I feel good. I feel STRONG and I'm ready to do this (again)!!!!!!!

Week Between Sessions Update

2009-08-05T07:09:00.003-04:00

My week off of Boot Camp has been relatively anxiety free so far. I am always concerned about the accountability part of working out but this week, each day, there have been others that have met me downtown.

On Saturday morning, we were having a Garage Sale so I got up early, donned my resistance band and my MP3 player and went for a run. I did approximately a 2 Mile loop stopping about 3/4 of the way for some target work. I did dips, crunches, resistance band pushes and pulls, squats, sprints, curb push ups, step-ups, and a bit of other ab work before making my way home. I felt great afterwards knowing that I had made the decision to get up and had pushed myself to work hard in the time that I had.

Intensity Level : 8.8

I took Sunday off to rest and enjoy my friends and family.

Monday morning came early and I headed downtown hopeful that someone would show up to work out with me. There were three of us and we decided to do the Mile loop with pit stops. We did 3-way calf-raises, squat-backs, assisted spread-eagle jumps, push ups, lunges, wall sits, dips and push ups, and reverse crunches. After we returned to home camp, we did lots of ab work before treating ourselves to a few longer-than-usual stretches. It was a great work-out and I was in good company.

Intensity Level : 8.9

Tuesday morning, I was pretty tired but that wasn't going to stop me from heading down. Stephanie taught on Tuesday and it was a full-body, hard work out. We warmed up with a ten minute run which we haven't done in a while. It was nice to run again with relatively no pain in my foot. The air was extremely hot and felt heavy and I had to cover my mouth when running through certain areas because of the swarms of gnats and bugs. When we returned, we did lots of hand weight arm work with stability leg work integrated then moved on to resistance band work and push ups and dips followed by ab work then stretching. We were all fully-sweat-drenched at the end of class because of the heat and humidity but I felt really strong afterwards.

Intensity Level : 9

This morning, there were three of us that met. We did a run towards the "Plainfield Steps" and along the way, we stopped for step-ups, sprints, robot walks, step-up hip raises, steps, push ups and dips. We decided upon arriving at the steps that because it was still pretty dark, we would avoid them for safety. (I am determined to hit those steps sometime this week, even if it's on my own.) We made our way back to home camp and did some weights and ab work before stretching.

Intensity Level : 8

I am looking forward to tomorrow's class with Stephanie and Friday and Saturday mornings. I am feeling stressed this week but my work-outs are helping me release some of that stress and cope with situations of frustration. I have been tired getting up but once I've started working out, energy begins to flow into me and it lasts through most of the day.

This week, I have noticed a change in my clothing. Many of the items that I have not even considered wearing in years are making it out of my closet and onto my body (many of them haven't been worn out of the house yet, but, hey, baby steps, right?). I have to admit that I'm anxious to do our re-assessments on Sunday and find out where I'm really at with measurements and in pounds. But I must also say that I am feeling great most of the time now and my outlook is happy which truly is the most important thing.

Physical exercise continues to be a daily blessing for me and has been the tool that I have needed for so long in my life to equip me with the confidence and allow me to find the inner-strength I've needed to be successful in many areas of my life that have lacked in the past. I do believe that all things are simply gifts to us and that we are designed to have the free will to choose how we use or do not use them. Every day, I want to make the most of what I've been given in all areas of my life but my physical body needs to be a priority and I don't feel guilty anymore making it one. It really is the only body I have and if it isn't working properly, I have to make the conscious decision to do something about it and give it my full attention for tune-ups and repairs (ok, sometimes complete overhauls too!) every chance I get.

I'm to a point now where I don't see daily exercise as a chore but as a part of my every day routine for well-being. I enjoy it and I want to do it. If I miss it, my body feels lethargic and my mind feels stressed. I have made the decision to make daily exercise a PRIORITY and even though it means that I have to sacrifice some other things in my life, I realize that the mental and physical benefits that I get from it completely outweigh the sacrifices I have to make to do it.

R2 D20

2009-08-03T06:52:00.002-04:00

It was the final day of this session and I couldn't believe it was over already. I am still enjoying every day and am sad when the sessions end.

We had a great last day work-out complete with strength training of various types, endurance stuff and core.

Intensity Level : 9.2

This Boot Camp session has taught me so many things. I've been able to feel a real change in my personal strength and endurance levels. I notice that tasks around the house like carrying laundry and heavy things up and down the stairs or mowing the lawn are much easier these days. I tend to find myself busier during my days at home with less time on the computer and watching TV. I always have more energy on the days that I work out on so I've been trying to get a good work out in on Saturdays too now. I do believe that it's important for me to take a day off per week so I am still taking Sundays off. I am still amazed that I have stuck with this for the whole time. I am proud to say that I have not missed one day since the beginning. For me, that is a HUGE accomplishment!!! However, I do not continue to go because of my attendance record or to prove something to myself anymore, I can say now that Boot Camp is something that I enjoy. It makes me feel good. I truly do look forward to every single morning. And even when the tasks get tough, and they do sometimes, I WANT to do it! I KNOW that I CAN do it! And I still feel so accomplished when I follow through. I have grasped a motivation deep within my soul to push through and to strive for new goals and to be proud of myself when I get there. AND to keep reaching and making new goals instead of clinging to the old ones and stopping there.

I am finding myself looking less and less at the flaws in the mirror and looking more and more at the "whole picture" and being ok with it. I'm not going to lie and say that I never have days where I just don't feel good about how I feel people will perceive me or that I never have those days where I keep trying things on until there's a pile sky-high on my bed only to go back to the old "jeans and a black shirt" stand-by. But I will say that I am finding that there are a whole lot less of those days and that I am learning to care a lot less about how others may feel about how I look. I am finding that if someone gives me a compliment, it's a little less awkward for me and becoming a little easier to believe. I've been able to say "Thank-you." and not "Thanks, but..." I can count the number of times that I've been on the scale this month on one hand. When I do step on that scale, the number still hasn't changed much but I find myself thinking "eh, whatever..." not "OMGosh!!!", "yuck", "failure", "gross", etc...

I am finding myself reaching for food for comfort less frequently. I will not say that I have conquered this one yet because I still do struggle with it when stress gets to a high level.

I am feeling more confident in general. I've never had a problem speaking my mind in certain settings but I've surprised myself a few times within the past month to find that I've shared things that I've needed to with people that I may have, in the past, kept to myself and even though, in a few cases, it has caused conflict, I've felt good about sharing it.

I've said "yes" to a couple opportunities that I NEVER would have even considered in the past. And more importantly, I've said "NO" to some things that I've really needed to keep off my "Priority List".

I am looking ahead to the next session. I am excited. I am ready. I'm not holding anything back. This is "ME" and with every new day, I'm feeling better about who "ME" really is...

R2 D19

2009-07-30T23:39:00.002-04:00

Today was our FitPar assessment and although I only have a few minutes to share, I thought I'd fill you all in:

I did reasonably well. I would've loved to have been able to get up this morning with no injury but the fact remains that my foot is still a stumbling block and some of my scores reflect that. I did try my hardest today to do my personal best and I am pleased with my results. I know that there is nothing that I can do to make my foot better faster so I'm taking each day as it comes and working harder with focus on other areas of my body.

I'm still loving every single morning and would not trade this experience for the world!

So here's my latest scores compared with the last ones:

1 Mile
8:28 8:36
(I did much better on this than I thought I would.)

Dips
41 43

Push Ups
27 34

Squats
58 60

Crunches
88 101

Front Plank
2:20 3:35

Rev. Crunches
70 74

Shuttle
38 27
(Ouch! Hmmm, not sure why I was so behind in this one...)

Jump Rope
158 138
(I had to do some today one-footed so it did slow me down...)

Today's Intensity Level : 9

R2 D18

2009-07-29T07:21:00.003-04:00

This morning, after the usual get up, get ready stuff, I headed downtown. I arrived on time and saw lots of new faces. It was bring a friend day and lots of people brought friends. I, however didn't have anyone show up to work-out with me...Sigh...Boo :-(

Anyway, we started out with a circuit warm-up of forward and backward sumo walks and hoops. Then we moved on to a full obstacle course circuit.

We did forward and backward lunges, Star (death) jumps (still one of my least favorite of all Boot Camp exercises), ammo can lifts, push ups, dips, undulations, PVC lifts, resistance band pushes and pulls, and jump rope. It was a great circuit and my goal was to get through it twice which I did (minus the dips second time, I'm not sure if I forgot on accident or subconsciously left them out, oops! I guess I'll be doing those on a chair in a minute...).

It was a great circuit! Challenging, but do-able.

After the circuit, we did some team rope work with squats then finished off with a little bit of core.

Today's class was good and it moved fast because of all of the activity changes. I felt full of energy afterwards and did a quick Victory Lap over the bridge and back while enjoying the beautiful morning sky. During my quick "lap", I reflected on tomorrow's FitPar assessment test and although I can't say I'm excited for the assessment because of the mile, I am curious to see how I'm continuing to progress. I am feeling physically stronger. I'm beginning to understand what it means to have my core "engaged" during work-outs and I'm hopeful to break the 3 minute marker on Plank.

Intensity Level Today : 8.9

R2 D17

2009-07-28T16:24:00.002-04:00

Once again, I got into bed about an hour later than what I should've so this morning came too soon. I did push the snooze but I was up before the second alarm went off.

I was able to get myself ready and have a small bowl of cereal before heading out the door.

When I arrived, there were no mats out so I assumed that we would be traveling again and guessed that we would be doing the mile loop with some pit stops. I was pleasantly surprised when I noticed campers with black bags in their grasp. I soon found out that today would be a TRX day. I instantly felt surge of excitement and adrenaline shoot through my veins. Today was going to be a very challenging work-out. And I was pumped.

We made our way downtown. We ran about a half a mile (the most that I've run without stopping on my foot) and I did pretty well keeping up. I was annoyed by my foot but it was not the focus of my morning.

We got to our location and attached the TRX suspension system to some light posts. They felt pretty secure however, I must admit, I was a little apprehensive of how much weight they would be able to handle. We did arms, legs, shoulders and backs on the TRX. It's amazing how hard it is to utilize your body's strength when you're working against it's weight. Every exercise seems easy in theory but once you're doing it, it pushes each area of your body to it' physical limit. It challenges your core strength and your focus. It pushes you to see just how far you can go into a stretch or exercise while still maintaining good form. And I LOVE it!!!

I was happy that none of the posts fell down and have to admit that I was a little sad that we were done when it was time to put the TRX's back into their bags to return to home camp.

When we returned, we did some core exercises and stretching.

I feel good. I feel accomplished. TRX targets muscles that some of our other classes don't and I know that I will be sore tomorrow but I feel good knowing that I did a good job today and worked extremely hard.

Today's Intensity Level : 9.5

Tomorrow is bring a friend day. I don't know of anyone coming out to join me yet but I hope someone will. But this is for me and that's all that matters so if no one shows, I'll still work my hardest. I'm still feeling great and still excited for each new day's challenge. Yes!!!!

R2 D16

2009-07-27T10:33:00.002-04:00

Got in bed somewhat early after 2 night this weekend of 4 hours of sleep. I really needed the sleep but was surprised that I got up right after the alarm went off with no difficulty.

I had time to eat some shredded wheat, have a glass of water and get myself ready with a few minutes to spare. It was nice.

I was really excited to get back into the swing of things this morning because I did not do anything physical this weekend and did indulge in a few no-no's courtesy of a barbecue and a sleep-over for my son and his friends.

Today, I renewed my commitment to eating healthy and I will not dwell on the weekend. However, I must say that I am realizing that the weekends tend to be where I struggle the most so I need to think of some new strategies to at least do better on one of the days.

We began this morning with a jog in a new direction. We found out upon arriving that today was going to be a "heavy leg" day. We jogged North this morning which we haven't done before and I noticed that the river was purple and beautiful today. It was extremely humid and again, the sweat flowed. We did wall sits, resistance band work, lunges, drive-down lunges, step-ups, squats and a few more exercises before making our way back to home base. We did more leg work with weights, alphabet traces and some core work to finish up.

My heel was really bothering me again this morning but I did make a commitment to work through it and I did notice that towards the end of class, it seemed to bother me less. I must admit that even though I am determined, feelings of discouragement and frustration are still ever present during my work-outs. I wonder if I'll ever have the same strength in my foot/ankle as I did in the past. I'm very nervous about the timed mile on Thursday. I haven't ran straight through a mile since my injury. I know that my speed is not where it was because my stride is still way off so I'm setting a goal of 9 minutes, 28 seconds which allows me a full minute grace.

Intensity Level Today : 9.1

Tomorrow is a new day but I'm going to enjoy the rest of today!!!

R2 D15

2009-07-24T07:31:00.003-04:00

Sorry to all my daily readers. Yesterday was a full day and no time to get on the computer to blog.

But Yesterday's class was again, amazing. The Intensity Level was about 9.3. This week, I feel like Rob is really pushing us to a new level of personal best and I LOVE IT!!!!!

After another restless night, I got up, and got ready with a determined attitude and a willing spirit.

When I got downtown, Stephanie did a light warm up with us, we did a small drill to get our blood pumping and then we were given a series of exercises to complete.

We were given directions to do 100 reps of each task. I found myself wondering if I'd be able do it and doubting myself before I even began. I almost caught myself thinking "I can't..." But I resolved to do it and I was determined to finish whether I did it in the allowed time of had to stay after to complete the tasks.

I started out with what I thought would be the hard stuff for my body. I broke down each task into 25 reps each. We did undulation (not sure it that's the right term) which is basically using a heavy rope to drum on the ground, TRX rows (which I could not do 25 of at a time without a rest break), dips, crunches, reverse crunches, curls, push ups, military presses (OMGosh, 100 reps of this one was really hard!!!). I think that's all of them but I may have forgotten one? I did have to make some adjustments throughout class because my arms were burning and feeling fatigued at many points during the circuit. The sweat poured profusely today (Gross!). And once again, in the distance, I swear I could hear Beyonce's Survivor and the Rocky Theme Song. There were a few times that I had to stop for a moment but I was able to keep a strong attitude, a steady pace and a determination to finish.

And I did, with a few minutes to spare!

I AM STRONG!!!

I DID A GOOD JOB TODAY!!!

AND I FINISHED WHAT I STARTED!!!

I'm ready to face this last day of a very tough week and I'm thankful that this week, I've been able to use Boot Camp as a stress and frustration outlet. I love the fact that I still get excited about what's to come daily and continue to crave the self-motivation and accomplishments that I continue to achieve daily.

Intensity Level Today : 10!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wooohooo!

R2 D13

2009-07-22T07:16:00.002-04:00

This morning, I didn't wake up before the alarm but I did get up with it and felt good. I went to bed a little bit earlier than I have been and that makes a big difference. I got myself ready, toasted a piece of Sesame Ezekial and was on my way.

I arrived downtown a few minutes early which was nice because I didn't feel rushed. I noticed that there were no mats out. Yes!!! Today was going to be traveling day. I knew I was in for a challenging hour.

We did some light stretching and a very short warm-up then we were off. We headed downtown by way of a new route. I love the usual route that we take but it was nice to have a change of surroundings. We ran through downtown pit-stopping for lunges, sumo & platypus walks, Calder jump-ups, resistance band work (lost some hair out of my ponytail on this one today...OUCH!!!), push ups, step ups (on a very high step for my 5' 1 1/2" body but it really pushed me!), reverse crunches, up & down steps, dips, and probably a few more that I can't remember, and headed back to home camp. I realized a few minutes after we left home camp that I had forgotten my Ibuprofen this morning which did cause a nagging annoyance but the pain was not strong enough to hold me back. The words "Determination", "You are STRONG!!!", and "You CAN do this!!!" played through my mind though out our journey today. I never got to a point today where I wanted to stop. From the beginning, I made up my mind to work hard the whole class and I would not allow myself to be cheated out of any valuable time.

We ran back at our own pace and even though my own pace isn't as fast as it may have been a few weeks ago, I pushed hard and when I could see the park, I dug deep and sprinted through to the end. The sprinklers were on and I rewarded myself to a nice, refreshing cool-down. It was extremely humid this morning and I was plentifully covered with a thick layer of hot sweat so the cold water felt like a shower from heaven as it hit my face, head and arms. I took lots of deep breaths and smiled to myself feeling accomplished and STRONG. After Rob returned, we did a very challenging plank series, and some other ab work before stretching.

Intensity Level Today : 9.6

The past few days have been challenging but amazing!!! This is the Boot Camp that I love!!!

Give me more!!!!!!!!!! RRRRRRarrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

R2 D12

2009-07-21T08:47:00.002-04:00

So this morning, I did push the snooze again. I guess tomorrow's goal will be to get up when the alarm goes off. Still felt pretty tired when I got up but my foot felt pretty good again this morning.

I got myself ready and had time for piece of toasted Ezekial with a smidgen of plumb jam then headed out the door.

When I arrived, we did a short warm up then rob told us to do a warm-up run. I was a little bit apprehensive about running a distance because I haven't done that since my injury first occurred. But my foot felt good and I had relatively no pain, so I took a huge deep-cleansing breath, did one more really good foot and leg stretch and I was on my way.

This morning, the air was crisp and cool. The sky was still deep midnight blue and the water was still. I ran much slower and more carefully today and really took in my surroundings. I noticed a lot more ducks than usual and a few birds. The weatherball was glowing and the city lights were beautiful against the dark backdrop. After I turned around to head back, I tried to focus on my form and push myself to increase my speed just a little bit. I made it back and still had no real pain. My foot is still a little bit unstable and a bit uncomfortable but I do feel like I am healing and that with every day, I'm able to do more.

When we got back, we were given a circuit obstacle course with heavy focus on legs. We did push ups, dips, squats, lunges, resistance band work, hoops, free weights, reverse crunches, and sprints (Wow, I really noticed on this one that I've lost lots of speed...). I focused the most on form and endurance through the circuit. I was moving a bit slower than some of the other girls but I did complete each task and I do feel like I did a good job today. After we finished our circuit, we did some partner core work (Thanks, Annie, for your encouraging smile!), and a bit of stretching.

Rob gave us a challenge today to try to eliminate all processed food for the rest of the week and see how we feel. I'm going to try to stick to the challenge because I already know that I feel better when I'm eating more fruits, veggies and whole grains.

I'm looking forward to getting up tomorrow and starting my day out with an awesome, energy boosting workout!!!

Intensity Level Today : 8.5

R2 D11

2009-07-20T08:10:00.002-04:00

So last night, I got in bed at a decent time and went right to sleep.

This morning, I did not wake up before the alarm and I did push snooze, but only once, and did not fall back asleep after I had pushed it.

I got up, got myself ready, had a mini bowl of granola, made myself some coffee, and I was on my way. My foot was still a little achy this morning but today was the first time since my injury that I didn't feel "real" pain in it when I stepped out of bed. I felt happy, even relieved knowing that even though I took the weekend off, I was fully physically ready for the week ahead of me.

On my way downtown, I shook off the weekend and prepared myself for a challenging day. When I arrived, I still felt physically tired and not quite awake yet but after our warm up, I was good to go.

The air was cool this morning but perfect for me. We started with some stations of jump rope (hadn't done that since the injury...started out on my good foot only), resistance band arms, hoops, push ups, running, shuffling, and weights. The only time I noticed pain in my foot was when I attempted to do something on that foot alone and then I made adjustments to complete the task.

Rob kept us moving today and we did many things today that were more physically challenging to me. I kept up with commands, completing everything that was asked with everything I had in me (other than the V-ups, which I have to admit I cheated a little on...).

Today was another physically "hard" day. I felt accomplished, but drained at the end of class. I love the challenge!!!! I strive to work harder when I find out that I can do things that I didn't think I could do. When we have a work out like we've had for the past few work outs, I leave smiling, feeling like I put my whole self into the full hour and could not have done anything differently that would have pushed myself more.

I'm ready for my week. I'm ready for tomorrow's class. And I'm grateful that I can focus on my whole body without pain getting in the way. I'm hopeful that at the end of this week, I'll be ready to run again.

Intensity Level Today : 9.5

Wow, we're over half way done with this session! Booooo :-(

But I'm excited for tomorrow.......

R2 D10

2009-07-20T07:44:00.002-04:00

So Friday and over the weekend, because of circumstances beyond my control, I didn't get a chance to blog. So I'll share today about Friday, the weekend and then I'll do a post for today.

Friday morning, once again, I was extremely tired getting up. We got in bed too late and Chad ended up having to go in early for work which caused an issue with timing and the kids. I would like to thank my mom, who so graciously stepped in when i asked to take them last minute so that I could still attend boot camp.

When I arrived, there were only a handful of campers. I wondered what we would be doing since there were so few of us. My foot was still hurting and I was feeling pretty discouraged but determined to do everything that was planned for the day.

We started with a light warm up then we were introduced to a new "tool" for working out. Rob had created homemade "body bars" out of large PVC pipe, sand and water. We were instructed to pick up the bars with a partner and were led on a series of exercises throughout the entire hour. We also utilized medicine balls and ammo cans. The ammo cans are awkwardly shaped and heavy and they are very physically draining to work with.

We did jogging while lifting the bar, jogging with the bar on our shoulders, jogging with the bar up, and then did several exercises utilizing the bar. We did rows, squats, lunges, partner assisted triceps, curls, and ab work. Because the bar was filled with water and sloshed with movement, it was extremely difficult, at times, to complete a task which, at first, seemed easy. Especially because I got to a point where I was dripping sweat and my hands were sliding off the slippery pipe. My stability was definitely tested and my core was pushed to the max.

It was an amazing work-out and I felt great when I left!!! I'm glad our classes are an hour because I definitly had very little energy left in my "tank" when we were done. I love feeling like that!

Intensity Level : 9.4

On Friday during the day, my foot throbbed and was hurting most of the day. I made a decision that was excruciatingly hard for me. I decided not to do the 5K walk on Saturday. I felt very discouraged and like I had let myself down. But at the same time, I knew that my body (mainly my foot) physically needed the rest so I sighed the big sigh and resolved to take the weekend off. And I did, I wouldn't say I had a relaxing weekend but I did try to stay off my foot and elevate it when I had the chance.

R2 D9

2009-07-16T07:42:00.002-04:00

Again, got in bed too late last night so had a difficult time getting moving this morning. I hit the snooze but only once, then decided to get up and get myself ready. I popped a piece of Ezekial Raisin bread in the toaster, made coffee (really needed the X-tra boost today), brushed my teeth and out the door I was headed.

I was determined to get the absolute best work out possible today and when I arrived, I remembered that Rob told us yesterday that he would not be here today.

Because I have such a hard time with change and crave consistency, I was apprehensive about the workout that we'd be doing with Stephanie this morning.

We started with a basic warm up and then did a circuit, we had a "heavy arm" day today.We did push ups, dips, lots of separate work with the resistance bands, lunges (still have a hard time with my left leg and foot), military presses, shoulder work, WITY's, curls, and a few others. We ran laps in between. We also did "horse pulls" and some core work before finishing with stretching. Stephanie did an excellent job of varying the exercises and really pushing us to our physical limit today. I felt very strong and accomplished at the end of class.

Although my foot was bugging me today and now my knee a bit too, I made it through the work out with very little modifications to the regular exercises. I felt good about that.

Intensity Level Today: 8.9

I am excited for tomorrow and looking forward to the weekend. I probably won't be running but am walking the 5K this weekend and I feel ok about that. Even though I hate running so much, I'm finding that I'm missing it, believe it or not!!! I can't wait until my body is restored and I can make it through workouts unaffected.

Although I can't say "I'M back!" quite yet, I will say "Watch out!" cause that wall is getting pretty tipsy and it's gonna fall down any day now. And when it does, I'll be right there waiting to stomp my way through the rubble!!!

R2 D8

2009-07-15T07:36:00.004-04:00

Have 10 minutes to blog so this one will be short:

Got up this morning feeling a bit groggy and tired but ready for a challenge. Did my usual morning routine and then headed Downtown.

When I arrived, I noticed that there were no mats on the ground today. Immediately, I felt a burst of excitement and adrenaline. I knew that today was going to be an intense day.

We began with a little warm up then headed out. The sky was dark and full and the air was humid and heavy. We did long run with lots of pit stops. We did wall sits, hill bursts, push ups, dips, calf-raises and a few other things before a hill sprint and heading back to home base. I focused on completing the tasks and pushing myself but my foot was definitely still getting in the way. I was able to do most of the tasks that we were given today with little pain, mostly just an annoyance, but was operating at a much lower speed. I am still EXTREMELY frustrated and let-down, almost angry (although I don't know why I'm feeling angry or where that feeling is coming from and certainly don't have it directed at anyone?). I just want to be able to do everything at full capacity. I did get a great challenging work out in this morning and I do feel good about that. I actually think that even though I'm running slower (really, walk/jogging), it's pushing me a little bit more because it's harder physically and it makes my other muscles work a bit harder. I know that this will pass, I'm just having a hard time waiting...

One of the night bootcampers has on her page "PAIN is WEAKNESS leaving the body". I am going to store that thought in my heart and my mind so that when the going gets tough, I can remember that this whole foot issue is only going to make me STRONGER.

Intensity Level Today: 8.75

Tomorrow is a new day and it's thundering and lightning outside but the sun will shine soon and I can't wait! I CAN DO THIS!!!!! AND I WILL NOT QUIT!!!!!!!

R2 D7

2009-07-14T07:13:00.002-04:00

So last night, worked late, got home late, got in bed late, didn't get to sleep til almost 1. Bad news! The alarm went off just before 5 and I did, in fact, hit the snooze. I actually fell back asleep this morning and I have to admit that I considered for a millisecond turning the alarm off all together and drifting back to dreamland BUT I didn't do it. That inner Wendy, the voice of reason, but still nagging sometimes, would not have it. After fighting the "internal battle" for a few minutes, I realized that I wasn't gonna win this one so I took a deep breath, put my feet on the floor, wiped the sleep out of my eyes, splashed some cold water on my face, got dressed, grabbed a piece of toast and was on my way!!!

I wrapped my foot good this morning and I'm excited that each day, the pain level seems to be going down. I am still taking regular doses of Ibuprofen and doing about an hour of good stretching during the day. Yesterday at the salon, I was on my feet for most of the day. I did notice that the pain got worse at the end of the day after standing on it. I'm missing my high heels. I'm still looking for some other shoes that will provide comfort, support for my foot, and look good. I'm not sure they're out there...

Okay, so back to the morning, we started out with some light cardio, did some "animal walking", which was actually pretty hard, I haven't "crab-walked" since I was little and I remember it being much easier. Then we did some partner exercises, team circuits with running in between (I jogged today for the first time in almost a week.), then some core.

My foot definitely slowed me down but I was able to do 90% of what we did in class today and that was encouraging. I still have pain when I try to do most things requiring me to use just that leg so when I feel the pain start, I do ease off. I'm amazed that in just under a week, I've lost so much strength. I'm still hopeful that I'll be able to complete the 5K scheduled for Saturday but I'm thinking I'll probably have to walk it if I do.

Today was a better day. I'm looking forward to tomorrow and being able to do even more. I do long for "the challenge" but I want to be able to do it with no physical limitations. I know I'll get there and I'm encouraged that I'm finally able to work on getting over that "wall". I just can't see the other side yet.

Intensity Level Today : 7.5

Tomorrow, I hope I can say it was a 10!!!!!!

R2 D6

2009-07-13T07:16:00.003-04:00

Over the weekend, I rested, wrapped and iced my foot. All in all, it felt "better" this morning. The pain was still there but not as intense and I got up determined to do my very best at Boot Camp today.

When I arrived, I got out of the van and was mentally ready for as much action as I could physically do.

We started out with a little bit of cardio then the class was off for a short run. I knew that it probably wasn't a good idea for me to run so I stayed back and did arms and abs. I really had to fight the feelings of discouragement and frustration. I tried to not focus on my foot but to focus on getting the most out of each task I could complete. We did a circuit today and in between stations, instead of running, I walked briskly with the added resistance of weights. I did reverse crunches, curls, push ups, dips, squats, resistance band pushes and pulls, squats, step-ups (slowly), presses and some other arm exercises. I had to omit the running, star jumps (yeah, that one broke my heart), hoops, shuffles, skipping and lunges today. When we finished the circuit, we did a short drill around the mats. When I started Boot Camp, I had 4 lb. weights, then went to 5's then 8's and working my way to 10's. I didn't realize how much physically stronger I am until I used those 5's today. It was a piece of cake (oooooo, I said cake...that might be push ups...) and I could do so many more reps with them. That was encouraging because it was a true sign that I am moving forward and making progress.

We finished off this morning with some short, but good, core work and stretching.

I definitely felt better this morning than Thursday but for me, this is extremely hard. I hate limitations. I am not someone who likes to wait and unfortunately, I think that time is the only thing that is going to heal. I am suppose to be doing a 5K on Saturday. At this point, I am thinking that it is probably unlikely but I am continuing to pray and hope for a complete recovery by Friday so I will see how I feel Friday, check with my doctor and wait to make my decision until then. I'm trying to be smart and I do realize that pain is a sign from my body that I probably need to back of just a little bit, at least until I'm back to full working capacity. So, for now, I'm taking each day as it comes, doing the most that I can and keeping high expectations for every new day and every new work out, but staying within the boundaries of what is realistic for my body to allow healing.

I still feel strong, but limited. I AM determined. I KNOW I can push through this. I WILL NOT let this bring me down. And I WILL continue to work on being healthy and in MY best physical design.

Intensity Level Today : 6.5

R2 D5

2009-07-10T07:50:00.003-04:00

Okay so today I will be completely honest in my blog.

I am frustrated! I rested on the couch last night, soaked my foot in an Epsom Salt bath, stretched, iced, massaged and believed that I'd wake up back to normal.

When I woke up, I circled my foot around and still felt a little bit of pain but it seemed to be much better. Then I stepped on the floor and realized immediately that I was not miraculously healed over night as I had hoped.

I took several deep breaths, got myself ready, had some breakfast and headed out the door still hopeful that it would just "go away" once I got there.

When I arrived, we did some light cardio and I felt pretty good. I actually thought for a moment that it was going away. The class did some walking, jogging and sprinting and I pretty much did light jogging and walking. I completely scaled back on how much I typically do but towards the end of the 10 minutes, I realized that the pain was still there every single time my heel touched the ground.

Next, we did some arm resistance band work, carrying ammo boxes and pushed Rob's van from one end of the parking lot to the other (I stayed on my toes...). Just about the time I started to feel like I was accomplishing something, I even almost forgot the pain was there, something "snapped". The pain worsened. I felt like there was a rubber band in the back of my foot that snapped but instead of releasing tension and pain, it seemed to create more.

My frustration quickly grew to defeat. (Massive sigh...)

Just at the time when I'm feeling like I'm "at the top of my game" and getting healthier, being able to do more than I've ever been able to do, getting stronger and faster, something is standing in my way. And it's not something that I can bust through or trample over. I'm not gonna lie, this really sucks (sorry, Mom if you're reading this, but it does!).

I am NOT a quitter, I am more determined than ever to continue to move towards a healthier me. Even though I feel frustrated, sad and honestly, a little depressed, this can't stop me. In fact, I'm probably more determined now than before. And I'm still really enjoying every single day's work-out. It's become part of my day and I can't imagine my day without it I'm headed to the doctor this morning and I'm hopeful it's something simple that will heal if I rest and slow down. I'm praying that God will take this away so that I can continue to push and challenge myself and do what's right for my body and for my health.

I'm hopeful that this is just simply a stumbling block, a hurdle that is slightly higher than some of the rest. I finished the class doing everything that I could without my left foot. I can still do abs, arms, and use my other leg to it's full ability.

So if you're reading this and you believe in God, after you thank Him for this beautiful day and some of the other blessings you've been given, and come before Him with the important things weighing on your heart, if you think of it, send up a request for a full, quick recovery for Wendy, please!

R2 D4

2009-07-09T07:11:00.002-04:00

This morning, I did not wake up before the alarm. In fact, I did push the snooze and had to force my body up and out of bed.

I was excited about today's challenge. But my body was tired.

I took my time getting up and ready this morning, had my breakfast and was out the door.

I tried to charge myself up on the way downtown, took lots of deep breaths and focused on the events ahead.

We began the morning with dips and the mile.

I did not have music today and was a little sad about that but it did allow me to focus a little bit more on my breathing, relaxing my shoulders, neck and wrists, and keeping my stride consistent. The first quarter of the mile was tough. I still felt physically tired and had to really focus on "pushing through". After I crossed the bridge and knew that I was about half way, I tried to pick up my pace a little bit and really pushed myself hard. About 3/4 of the way through, I felt my usual urge to walk for just a second and my mind was saying "You can't, You can't...) but I forced those negative thoughts down deep and repeated to myself "You can, YOU CAN!!!" And I swear I heard "Ten Thousand Fists" somewhere in the distance. I pushed harder and harder until I got to the bridge and didn't stop to walk. Before I knew it, I was to the homestretch and once my feet hit those wooden planks, I picked up my pace even more and sprinted to the end with everything left in me. My time today was 8:28. I managed to take another 30 seconds off and I was excited about that but more importantly, I ran the whole way. Now I know that I can do it so no more walking in The Mile for this girl!

After the mile, we did the rest of our Fit Par challenges. I did well until we got to jump rope. About half way through jumping, my left heel started hurting with every jump. I did my best to complete each task but the annoyance of heel pain definitely hindered the rest of my scores.

According to what I've read online, it could be because my body isn't use to the pounding of pavement on my feet and because I'm overweight, it causes extra stress. I also found out at Gazelle that I am a pronater which means that my ankles roll inward and that I don't support certain areas of my feet properly so I did purchase shoes specifically for that. Also according to what I've read, I may have to get a heel insert to help take some of the pressure off when I do activities that require excessive heel pounding. So I guess I'll be visiting Gazelle again soon.

Anyway, not much time left before work so let's get to the scores. This time, I'm listing my previous final Fit Par score compared with today's scores. I improved some in most areas but there was not as dramatic of a jump today as there was last time.

1 Mile Run
8:58 - 8:28

Dips (60 seconds)
37 - 41

Push Ups (60 seconds)
29 modified - 1o regular + 17 modified

Squats (60 seconds)
47 - 58

Crunches (60 seconds)
81-88

Plank
3:00 - 2:20 (yes, this one went down...hmmm...)

Reverse Crunches (60 seconds)
71 - 71 (hmm, the same?)

Shuttle (2 minutes this time, so I really can't compare scores)
38

Jump Rope (2 minutes)
149 - 158

So all in all, I did good today. I am disappointed about the plank and I know the shuttle would've been better if my heel didn't hurt but other than that, I feel pretty good. I had a goal to beat my mile by 15 seconds and I beat it by double that so I am proud of myself. My heel is still very sore when I touch it and step down on it so I guess we'll see how work goes and if it's still hurting after that, I'll be visiting Gazelle tonight so I can hopefully resolve, or at least help this issue before tomorrow so I can be at my fullest potential for class.

Now, I'm off for another day. And tomorrow is a new day and I hope my heel heals by then!

R2 D3

2009-07-08T07:32:00.002-04:00

So this morning, I got up early!!! Even before the alarm went off. I enjoyed a few minutes at home before having a quick bite and getting myself ready to head out the door.

It was a very cool morning this morning and I was anticipating the work out ahead of me. I knew that today was going to be a challenging day because Rob informed us yesterday that we'd be introduced to the Mile today which meant we'd be doing "exercise pit stops" along the way.

When I arrived, I felt good, charged up and ready. We started out on our way and made stops for wall sits, squat jumps, push ups, rev. crunches, calf raises, touch downs, dips, lunges, and step-ups. I maintained a good pace today and really concentrated on pushing myself to reach new limits today.

When we were on Michigan bridge and doing our touch downs by Varnum, I couldn't help but marvel at the awesomeness of the morning sky. It was bright, baby blue with electric white streaks and sheets of pink, purple and pale yellow. Truly magnificent! What a beautiful painting for me to enjoy throughout the whole work out this morning!!!!

When we were on our homestretch, I pushed myself hard to get to that finish line. It was great!!! There's is something truly exhilarating about crossing that "line" and knowing that you just completed the tasks set before you and that you accomplished every single one!

After the course, we did some core work and stretching. Once again, during our stretching, I looked around me. The painting had changed. The full moon was in view across the river and the colors of the sky had changed. The oranges and pinks that I noticed earlier were fading away revealing more blue. I even noticed that there was actually a "silver lining" on some of the clouds. I smiled to myself and took a huge refreshing breath enjoying every piece of creation that surrounded me. As we were finishing stretching, I swear I heard a "Good job, today!" followed by a breath of crisp air on my cheek.

I hope tomorrow morning's weather is as nice as it was this morning. I have a new goal set for the mile and will be setting new goals for my other Fitpar tasks tonight. I will make sure I post results tomorrow.

Intensity Level Today: 8-9 (Love it!)

Last night, I did get "the numbers" results from measurements and weight. And I'm on track. I have lost some inches and pounds. But I also gained inches in certain areas. I am using these measurements as a mere tool, a gauge, to make sure that I'm eating properly and doing what I need to be doing to get to the goal of a healthier me. I no longer have a "number" goal that I'm working towards. I no longer have a "magic size" that I'm trying to get to. I'm truly enjoying my mornings and the daily "high" I get from physical exercise. I'm working on feeling comfortable where I'm at and feeling good about me, regardless of what negative remarks I "hear" coming from the mirror. My "friend", Mr. Scale is developing quite a layer of dust and I'm sure he feels neglected. I'm not ready to smash him into a million pieces yet, but I definitely don't feel the emotional bond anymore that I have lived with for so long.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Today, I feel strong, motivated, and ready for the day!!!!!!!!!!

R2 D2 (Round 2, Day 2, not Star Wars)

2009-07-07T07:17:00.002-04:00

Got in bed at a good time last night, woke up with the alarm. Layed in bed for a couple minutes before getting up and getting myself ready without much effort. Had a quick breakfast (Save-a-Lot Shredded Wheat isn't too bad), then out the door.

Arrived at 5:29. We began with some jogging in place and mixed leg and arm exercises. We started out with some Cardio by way of 3 stations of activities. The first were hoops, we jumped with high knees straight through and sideways. Then, we did some cone shuffle drills. Then some lunges and more shuffles. It was a great way to get my heart pumping. Then, we headed over to another area and did arms. Resistance bands, Push ups 3 ways, and Dips. Then we did some team-assisted lunges and squats and played a glorified game of Keep-Away-Duck-Duck-Goose. It was silly but kept our heart rates up. After that, we did lots of ab work and finished off with stretching. Today was a good work-out.

I'm excited but nervous about tonight. We will have our fitness assessments so I will see the concrete evidence on paper of how I'm doing. I am determined to not get wrapped up in the numbers but again, am hopeful to see at least a small amount of change.

Rob told us that tomorrow we will be going out on the mile course and stopping along the way for different exercises. For me, it's much easier to get to my "Full Exertion Level" on these types of days. Although I'm not looking forward to actually running the mile on Thursday, I am looking forward to the challenge and have set a new time goal for myself.

I'm still feeling great and starting to think about what I can do over the weekend for exercise. It seems to work better if I plan ahead for it.

I'll be adding another thing to my daily journal. I'm going to try to keep track of how "intense" the training is on each day. So each day I'll be rating the Intensity Level of the session from 1-10. 1-no activity-10-Maximum, Full-on, Nothing Left To Give

Today's Class Intensity Level - 6.5

Second Round Boot Camp Day 1

2009-07-06T07:18:00.002-04:00

I did well over the weekend. Friday, I took the day completely off for a day of rest. Although it seemed nice to have a lazy day and lay around the house, I was sooooooo tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open and I didn't get anything accomplished. I think that for me, a day of rest is important but it still needs to include some form of physical activity, even if it's just a brisk stroll around the neighborhood a few times. When I "take a day" and do nothing for my body, I end up feeling lethargic and depressed and I don't like feeling that way. Saturday, I got up, with a good attitude knowing that I needed to get right out there and start the day off treating my body to the exercise it needed. I jogged/ran/walked a 3 Mile course stopping along the way for elevated push ups, dips, lunges, sprints, squats, shuffles and crunches. I felt much better the rest of the day and throughout Saturday evening. Sunday, I got up and started some projects around the house but then we moved to the couch for a movie which caused me to go down that same path of dozing and non-motivation. After a snooze, Chad did remind me of our plan to do a family hike so we packed up and headed out to the Comstock trails. About 1/4 Mile into the trail, the mosquitoes came out, they were HORRIBLE!!!!! We walked, maybe a couple miles but it wasn't an enjoyable hike. We made our way back to the van then headed over to Kent Skills for a short hike around the gardens and ropes course. I felt good but was a little disappointed that we didn't have fun as a family. Next time, we'll definitely apply HEAVY bug repellent before embarking on a trail journey.

Last night, I got in bed early but had a hard time falling asleep. I felt anxious and excited to start a new Boot Camp session and I wondered what we'd be doing today. Even though I did a pretty good job of staying on track alone, I was very relieved to know that I'd be back to a regular daily schedule and that I'd only have to do self-guided exercise on the weekends.

This morning, I woke up before the alarm, waited for it to go off then got up and got myself ready. I was very excited and ready a few minutes early, made sure I had all my stuff, left the house and arrived downtown.

There were a few familiar faces this morning and many new faces. Rob started us out with the business end of things reminding us about nutrition and expectations for the class, all good reminders and I tried to focus on them but I was ready to get moving. After a few minutes, we started out with some heart-rate raising punches and leg exercises. We partnered up and did a cone drill, a running drill, then did a resistance band drill. We ended up with new partners. It was a good drill but it was hard to be paired up with someone who didn't match in arm strength. I'm learning that we all have different strengths and abilities but it's very hard for me to depend on a partner when they don't have abilities above mine. I tend to stop pushing myself if the motivation to "keep up" isn't there. I need to realize that everyone pushes themselves differently and just because someone doesn't do things the same as I do, that doesn't mean they're not working hard or to the best of their ability.

We did some upper body work, core and stretching. When we were finished, I did a quick 5 minute run to make up for the time we spent standing in the beginning of class. I feel good this morning but I'm ready for tomorrow. I know that tomorrow will bring new challenges and I can't wait.

Tomorrow evening, we will have our re-assessments. I already know where I'm at on the scale (went to the doctor last week), so even though I haven't lost pounds, I am anxious to see where I'm at as far as measurements go. I know that it's only been one month since I've been working on this change to my lifestyle so I do NOT expect HUGE results, but I am hoping to, in the least, see a slight change in inches and percentage of body fat. I already know that I genuinely feel better and that I'm getting stronger but I have to share honestly that I'm hoping to see concrete evidence that I've made at least a little progress toward improvement from the appearance point of view. I think that would help me KNOW that I am succeeding in this change. But I will remind myself that it CAN NOT be the change in outward appearance that I focus on but how I FEEL that needs to be the most important thing. And I continue to feel energized, strong and full of life and I LOVE it!

Week-Between Thursday

2009-07-02T07:24:00.003-04:00

So I woke up this morning less than enthused about going back to the "other" camp but I knew that my sister was going to meet me there so I got up, dressed, had my oatmeal, brushed my teeth and made my way downtown.

When I arrived, I realized that there was no one else there. Hmm, waited a few minutes and a few cars showed up. We ended up with 5 people which was about 15 less than on Tuesday. Maybe because of the Holiday weekend?

I headed over where we were informed that this would be a "traveling day" and that we'd be doing steps. Then, with resistance bands in tow, we were off. We began jogging towards Plainfield. We did jogging, galloping, sprints, knees-ups, and more running until we reached "the steps".

Now, I've lived in GR all my life but I never knew these steps existed. They're tucked away on Plainfield and go up the Huge hill into a small neighborhood. After a few instructions, we were on our way up, I'm really not sure how many steps there were but it sure didn't seem as big of a task until I was about half way up and had to slow my pace to a walk. But I made it. We all did. Once we got to the top, we did elevated push ups, whew! Hard work but that inner G I Jane wanted to push me to get through them. Candy told us we'd be doing 20, I've never even done 10 regular push ups. How would I do this? But I pressed through. The numbers don't matter as everyone is at different strength levels but for me, I soon found out that I was able to do more than I thought I could do. And it felt good!!! I felt accomplished!!!

After the steps, we made our way back and did some core work before stretching and cooling down.

Today was a much better experience for me in a camp that I don't call my "home base". And I am considering doing some "drop-in" Saturday sessions. I was proud of myself and Rachel for finishing this class today. I know that we were both feeling drained before we started out.

I am worried about the weekend ahead. I know that the area that I still struggle with the most is food over-indulgence. I'm scared that with all the irresistible "options" that will be within my grasp, I will sabotage the work that I've put in to create a healthier body. But I want to see loved friends and family and be able hang out and kick-back. I realize that I am creating distance between myself and the people that don't support my efforts for a new healthy lifestyle. But I do I miss them. I'm trying to develop the willpower to say "no thank-you" or a strong "enough" but if I'm honest, I have to admit that I don't say "no" or "enough" until after I've had "too much".

So I'm trying to be continually aware of things around me that I know I need to stay away from. And I will work on that this weekend. I know that I can not be a hermit my whole life but maybe distance and separation is something that is okay right now while I'm in this time of re-training. Still hoping for a work-out buddy for tomorrow morning but haven't found one yet so I might head out to the gym that I am a member of and try to explore the surroundings with "new eyes" and create a heart-pumping work-out with a fresh perspective. But I'm still holding out for that partner!

Next week is a new session. Rob attended a training event since our last session so I am eagerly anticipating the new tasks that will await me. I am excited, ready and determined to begin a new month of challenging personal growth and physical successes! I CAN and I WILL!!!!!!!

Wednesday Week-Between

2009-07-01T08:40:00.002-04:00

This morning, I invited everybody I could think of to meet me for a work-out at the park.

When I arrived at 5:28, there was one lone car in the lot. After I parked, I realized that at least one brave soul decided to join me. Hooray!!! I wouldn't be doing it alone today. Thank-you Diana!!!!!

We waited until 5:32 then started out with a nice warm-up run, at a slight bit faster pace than I typically go so it was a good challenge for me.

We decided to run the mile with stops along the way. We ran the course backwards and stopped along the way for push ups, dips, calf-raises, reach-touch-downs, surge jumps, wall sits, and water. We finished the work out with a quick sprint, some stability and core work and stretching. It was much cooler this morning but I was still sweating. I definitely pushed myself today! It was so encouraging for me to have someone there to talk to and to work through the exercises with.

Tomorrow, we're doing one more free class at the traitor camp. I'm not looking forward to it but I know it will be a good work out. So far, I'm planning on being alone Friday morning but I'm hopeful that someone will join me for one last body blast before the Holiday weekend. I plan on hopefully doing some family walks and bike rides this weekend. Then Monday, I start my new session and I can't wait!!!!!

Different Boot camp

2009-06-30T06:52:00.002-04:00

So, this morning I headed downtown for a free session at a different boot camp.

I'm trying to have a positive attitude for this work out week so all I will say is:

KILLER session today!!! Running, Lunges, LUNGES, LUNGES (Up and down rain covered, slippery grass, my knees are already hurting which is not a good sign), sprints, sumo jumps, "platopus" walks, sit ups, bridges, wall jump-ups, jumping jacks, power jacks, resistance work...and more.

I can't wait til next week. I miss My trainer. I do great with someone pushing me but it all depends on the method of pushing and this morning's "pushing" wasn't the style that typically motivates me personally. I respect her as a trainer, just not what works best for me.

I'm going back Thursday because at least I won't be on my own but I'm looking forward to Monday with Rob and Stephanie.

Monday Solo Work-out

2009-06-29T08:19:00.003-04:00

This weekend was great!!!

I managed to get an awesome work-out in on Saturday thanks to the 5K run and yesterday, as a family, we took a nice, long bike ride. We rode in Riverside park and by Fifth Third Ball Park and then stopped at Wendy's for a Junior Frosty and some water before returning back to the van. It wasn't the best workout ever and the Frosty probably cancelled out most of the calories that I did burn on the ride. But I'm learning that it really is okay to treat myself to something sweet once in a while. It's just not a good idea to treat myself everyday and over-indulge to "make up" for missing out the past week. As a matter of fact, I enjoyed a piece of Coconut Dark Chocolate after the race and it was enough to satisfy my sweet tooth. I ate it slowly enjoying the flavor of every bite instead of sucking it down fast and looking for what was next on my personal menu.

This morning, I didn't have a difficult time getting up but I wondered if anyone would show up to work out with me. I got myself ready and headed downtown. I waited in my van until 5:32, then I decided that I needed to be on my way. I would be working out alone this morning but I could do this. I ran my usual warm-up enjoying the scenery around me, although I have to say that I definitely felt fearful and a bit nervous every time that I passed people on my way. I only had a couple guys "comment rudely" but I just kept running. I kept reminding myself that I am strong but I needed to be smart too so I did wear a pack this morning with my cell phone, water and keys in it. If I felt any danger, I could easily reach for my phone and my fingers could dial while I was running.

I stopped at Canal Park to do some dips, push ups and step ups. The I ran over the bridge and began my mile course backwards. I stopped along the way to do more push ups, reverse crunches, calf-raises, dips and then ran the rest of the way back. I have to honestly admit that I did get a "good" work out in but it wasn't as "great" as it could have been. Working out alone is still extremely hard for me. I don't think it's the competitiveness that I miss, I think it's more of the camaraderie. Once I returned to the park, I did more push ups, dips and some stretching before heading home.

When I got home, Chad was watching the news and there was a special on another Boot Camp going on in GR. They're offering free classes this week and even though I have no desire or intention of switching to this Boot Camp class, I know myself and I know in my heart that if I try to do this alone this week, I am going to fall short of MY best and it will discourage me in the end.

So, tomorrow morning, I'll be posting about my experience in a new Boot Camp with a different instructor. And please, if you're reading this and you have a "leading" to join me, don't hesitate or think twice about it because if you do, you'll find an excuse not to go. Make the personal commitment to feel good about yourself. AND tell someone that you're going to do it so you have the accountability to GET UP!!!

Between Camp Sessions Reeds Lake 5K Run

2009-06-27T21:33:00.003-04:00

I was nervous about the week between Boot Camp sessions but this morning, I was provided an opportunity to run the Reed's Lake 5K. A friend saw on my Facebook page that I was looking for someone to work out with today. He invited me at about 9:00 last night, I didn't take the time to think about how little preparation time I had or to reconsider because of my non-love of running. I just said "yes" quickly, found out the details and showed up this morning at 6:30 to register.

I've only done one other 5K and walked about half of it, but I did finish so I was ready for a new challenge. I needed to beat that time from last fall and I wanted to run the whole way.

I was a little apprehensive about getting there, parking and getting signed up alone but it went fine. I just needed a little help with my shoe tag.

When I got done registering, I realized I had over an hour before the start of the race.

I walked around East Grand Rapids slowly taking in the local sights. It's a great little "town" within our town. I'll definitely be planning a trip back soon when I can stay a little bit longer.

When we had about a half hour til the race start, I made my way down to the lake and took time to stretch. The sunshine peeked over the trees, sparkled off the water and smiled down on me. I took time to appreciate this beautiful day provided to help me face the challenge that awaited me.

I could hear the rumbles of the excited racers getting louder so I made my way up the hill and to the end of the starting line crowd. My heart began to race and my nerves started to kick in when I heard the Star Spangled Banner. I knew it wouldn't be long now. Before I knew it, we were off. There was no Ready or Set, Just GO, and it was time.

With music blaring loudly in my ears, I made my way through the first mile without many issues. It didn't seem too hot by the lake when I was stretching but the sun sizzled every time we ran though a non-shaded area. I made it through the first mile running at a good pace with no major issues.

About 1/4 mile into Mile #2, I started to feel my heart pounding harder and harder and my side began to burn a little bit. I made it though one more song, almost to the start of Mile 3 without walking. I tried and tried but at that point, I decided that I would not be running this whole race, I'd have to walk a bit. I was disappointed and felt a little let down but I knew that I had to focus on getting to the finish line and just do MY best. Up ahead, I saw a running sprinkler, on the course we were running. My walk turned to a run and before I knew it, I felt the cool relief of refreshing water on my skin.

I alternated between walking and running (and sprinkling) for the rest of the race. I did make a mental note to myself that the next time I run one of these, I need to walk the course a day or two ahead of time so I'll know where I'm at on the course.

Once I saw the finish line, I was relieved but a little in disbelief. I was confused about the course and thought there was a "loop" that I couldn't see. I asked the woman next to me if that was really it. She said "yep" and my heart started beating harder again.

I picked up my pace a bit and focused my eyes on that finish line. After a minute or so, I realized that it was further away than I thought and my pace slowed again. The adrenaline was flowing hard now but my body was fatigued and I felt like I couldn't run anymore. Just as I started to slow to walking again, I heard "Come on, Wendy". I had to look twice because I had planned on doing this race alone but I was so happy to see my family cheering me on and even though I felt a few tears welling up in my eyes, I knew I was almost there so I had to keep going and not look back. I could read the clock now and knew that I had beaten my last score. Yes!!! Just a few more steps...and a few more...and a few more...heart pounding, throat sore from the dry breaths that I was struggling to push in and out of my aching lungs...and I was done. Whew, I DID IT!!! I felt happy, accomplished, still a little bit disappointed that I had to walk some and a bit sick from the heat, but I DID it.

My time from last fall was
38:22

Today, my time was
33:38

So I beat my last time by almost 5 minutes. I succeeded in part of my goal and I'm happy about that. I will do more 5K's and I do hope to someday run the whole way but I have to focus on the fact that I did do better today and I did finish. I am getting stronger on this journey and the most important thing is that I keep it up. And I will!!!!

Day 20

2009-06-26T08:22:00.000-04:00

As I sit here enjoying my Spartan coffee, I don't know where to begin.

Pause, sip, sip...

Deep breath...

Okay, the thoughts are brewing...

We began with our warm-up run. The air was warm, but crisp as it grazed my skin. The sky was crystal and the river was a sheet of ebony glass. I ran alone today. No ducks or jumping fish. No words spoken. No distractions. Serenity. The air flowed easily to and from my lips and deep, calm breaths were plentiful. I laughed at the fact that I still HATE running. But I reflected on the realization that I was no longer running with the crushing weight that bore into my shoulders on the first day of Boot Camp and for as long as I could remember before that.

I pondered the thought that I had not become "HER". The vision of the woman that I wanted so desperately to be when I joined this class was not what was driving me to run today.

I came to the realization that I can no longer "live to live up" but need to live to be "ME". The "Measure" that beckoned me daily to the mirror can no longer slice into my spirit.

Sarah
Carmen
Allesandra
Adrianna
Jenna
Pamela
Brianna
Marisa
Dita

Tori

Just names, and few of the many on "my list". But, for me, the names that instantly conjure up images that bred the sickness, hate and desire that, for many years, had fueled every single angry, desperate slice to my bleeding soul. Some days, I didn't care. Some days I was fighting viciously to cover the wounds and to find something, anything, that would fill the empty shell that I had become. Forced back to the "reflection" that stood before my eyes, trapped, sinking deeper and deeper, believing that I would never "BE". NEVER.

Now, before you begin to psycho-analyze me, know that I am sharing this VERY personal part of my life because I KNOW that there are others that understand this pain and I know that by sharing it, it will help me continue to shift my thoughts. And I understand that Rob and Bootcamp didn't cause this "shift of thinking". I KNOW that this whole experience was a "DIVINE AIR HORN".

"Bootcamp" was a mere tool used to provide the shock that I needed to bring me back to REAL LIFE. It helped wake me up with the new realization that "Perfection" CAN NOT fuel "being". Gashing at every physical "imperfection" will never "make it all better" or make it go away. Boot camp is not a "quick fix" and it is not the perfect plan for everyone. Treating my body in a way that will help it function to carry out the " Original Wendy Design" is what MY focus needs to be on. And getting MY body into the physical shape (notice I did NOT say SIZE) that was in the "Original Blueprint" is essential. Obviously I haven't seen this "Blueprint" but the only way for me to know that I'm "Up to Code" is to know that I'm doing my personal best to follow the "Building Plans" that have been layed at my feet. This is why I WILL continue to make daily sacrifices to remain in Boot Camp.

I truly believe that the GIFT of Grand Rapids Adventure Boot Camp was carefully chosen, wrapped up in exquisite shimmery paper with a BIG, shiny, sparkly, one-of-a-kind bow, complete with homemade, hand-written tag in BIG, BOLD, unmistakable letters:

"To Wendy, With All MY Love"

Day 19 Part B

2009-06-25T22:12:00.004-04:00

So I've figured out that if I don't write in the morning that it's tough to get to it the rest of the day. Hmmm, kind of like working out...

Also, some of the details of the morning have faded away so I might not be as enthusiastically excited and on the exercise "high" that I'm usually on when I post. I can tell because my fingers are moving much slower.

As I said earlier, our re-assessments were today. I stayed up a few hours past when I wanted to be in bed last night and I had a very restless night again due to personal circumstances.

When the alarm went off, it felt as if I had just gotten to sleep and I couldn't believe that it was really time to get up. I turned the clock towards me hoping that the alarm was only in my dream but realized that I had actually pushed the snooze button already. I knew I had to get up and get ready fast.

Quick teeth brushing, dressing, unlaced shoes, ponytail, and breakfast on the go. This definitely was not how I wanted to start my morning but it was how it was and I had to deal with it. I collected my thoughts on the way and took many deep, cleansing breaths. When I arrived, I was excited and I was ready for the challenge.

I worried about the run because of the heat and because, well, it was a run. And although I truly believed that I would improve in many areas, I was really nervous that I was going to "fail" like so many times before and that I would let myself down again.

During our hour, we were given allotted periods of time in which to complete many tasks and performed all the same tasks that we did the first week. I am happy (Screaming Smile, Shouting from the roof-tops, happy) to say that I have improved in all but one area.

I debated all day on whether to share my actual numbers but I decided to share them just to keep me accountable and to give anyone reading this concrete proof that Rob's BootCamp works.

Here are my original and new scores:

Bench Dips: O-12 N-37

Crunches: O-49 N-81

Front Plank: O-2 Min. N-3 Min.

Jump Rope: O-69 ;-) N-149

Modified Push Up ("Girl" style, but they still count): O-29 N-29
*The same? I guess next time I'll shoot for tracking the "regular" style ones...

Reverse Crunches: O-37 N-71

Shuttle: O-13 N: 29
*I'm thinking maybe the first time I counted each back and forth as one which would actually make the number 14 1/2, but still improved.

Squats: O-37 N-47

Mile Run/Walk: O-11:00 N-8:58 (My goal was 10:00!)

*I only walked for 9 seconds of it, couldn't catch my breath, the air was excruciatingly heavy.
(PCD, Brittany, Tommy Lee, and Disturbed helped me along with this one. I'm not sure that I can say my song mix this morning was "God-sent", but it sure felt like it. Everybody has music that "charges" them, my music for running just happens to be a mix of "sexiliciously STRONG" and screaming "angry music". Hey, whatever works!!!)

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*I am not ommitting a portion of my score but elected not to be weighed or body-measured today. This was a HUGE decision for me but something I knew I needed to do.

I set my sights on a goal and I achieved it. I did it. I am proud of myself. I finished something that I said I would do. I am not "done", though. This truly is becoming part of me. It is part of me.

Now I just need to set new goals.

I'm not sure that I met the original non-score related goals that I set for myself when I signed up for Boot Camp.

Goals like:

Being/looking like "her"/that
Weighing "###"
Fitting into "that size"

My goals throughout this camp have changed. They've shifted from outward-focused to inner-focus. I'm not going to say that my original struggles no longer exist and that my mind doesn't still wander and dwell on them. But I'm setting personal goals that are challenging, but achievable. They're not related to anyone else's opinion or perceived opinion about me. They're surrounding how I feel about "me" and they're about being "ME". I am starting to accept "ME" and I have to say that I'm liking "ME" much more these days...

OOOOOOOOOOOOhhh no!!!!!!

OMGOSH, I have to go to bed!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I really need to get a clock by this computer.

Tomorrow's the last day of my first Boot Camp Ever and it's going to be here in a moment.

Day 19 Part A

2009-06-25T07:24:00.000-04:00

I don't have time to post before work today but I have LOADS to share. This morning, we had our fitness re-assessments:

I'm going to keep you on the edge of your seat til I have time to write when I get home from work...

Other than this little piece of info:

2 minutes 2 seconds

(You read it right, now read it again.)

2 MINUTES AND 2 SECONDS!!!!!!!

Come back later for "the rest of the story"...

Wait, didn't somebody already use that line?

I mean tune in tonight for "the exciting conclusion"...

Shoot, somebody used that one already too.

To find out "What I can do"?

Uh, No. Too many visions of Mad TV's "Stewart".

I did tell you in the beginning and I'll remind you now, I'm not a writer.

Just come back! I promise I'll tell you all about my AMAZING morning...

Day 18

2009-06-24T07:04:00.000-04:00

I had a restless night last night. I'm not really sure why but I just didn't sleep well.

The alarm went off and it took me a few minutes to roll out of bed and get ready to go. I knew that today was "Bring a friend" day and I wasn't sure how many people would be there but I knew I had to be.

When I arrived, I saw my older sister, Rachel, with her mat out and ready to go. Rachel had quite an ordeal (That's the understatement of the year!) over last Thanksgiving and Christmas and was confined to the hospital and in a coma. During that time, as a family, we had Faith that God would bring her through and allow her to live but for a time, we genuinely didn't "know" if the breaths that the ventilator provided for her would be her last. God was Faithful to answer our MANY prayers how we had hoped. It was a huge encouragement to see her this morning and be able to work out together.

We started out with our usual "jog". We both made it though jogging the whole way. Yes!

Then we did an obstacle course complete with free weights, hoops, rev. crunches, dips and push ups, forward and backward lunges, and resistance pushes and pulls. Rachel and I stayed together and we both made it through the course a few times. Rachel did great and it was nice to share the work-out this morning with her. It made the time pass faster too.

After we finished the course, we did some core work. It was hot today so the sweat was pouring but I definitely feel charged up and ready to face my longggggg day at the salon.

I found out this morning that there is a week in between sessions so I'm a little nervous about that time. I'm scared that because I have such a hard time over the weekends that a whole week of no classes will allow me to fall back into old habits. I'm going to try to find some "accountability partners" to exercise with during that week. I haven't had much success finding people to run with or workout with on the weekends which has been a bit discouraging. Still, I'm hopeful that some brave soul will come out of the woodwork and join me.

Obviously, ideally, the answer would be to depend on myself and to have the self-discipline to get up and go hard, alone. This is something that is phenomenally difficult for me which is why I think I've failed every other time I've hopped on the "healthy train". Maybe it's because I tend to be a dependant person? It just seems to help to have someone, a physical body, there to encourage me and push me. I'm hopeful that with practice, and daily consistency I'll be able to develop the inner motivation to do it on my own. I know ME, I'm just not there yet and I have to be honest about that.

I can't wait until tomorrow. The excitement is brewing...

We have our reassessments and I'm looking forward to raising my "Par" scores in every single area. The mile is already on my mind but I know that I shouldn't be worrying about it until tomorrow at the starting line. It's exciting to know that I will be able to set new personal goals and I'm hopeful that tomorrow at 6:30, I'll be able to celebrate my personal accomplishments.

Day 17

2009-06-23T07:19:00.000-04:00

This morning, again, I woke up before the alarm clock but layed there until it went off. I sat up, stretched and both feet hit the floor. I noticed on the way out of the bedroom that I had some new pain this morning. The bottom of my heel and the inside of my opposite knee were painful when I walked and I wondered if this would hinder me this morning.

I went ahead and got dressed, did my usual morning routine, with the replacement of shredded wheat, for oatmeal. Honestly, this week, I could care less if I ever saw oatmeal again.

I felt pretty good this morning when I arrived a few minutes early. I got out of the van, was slapped in the face by the hot steam of the morning air and remembered when I didn't see people getting their mats out that we were running today.

Big sigh, deep breath, "You can do this, Wendy..."

I did my best to try to stretch the pain away. Rob told us to go out for our usual warm-up but to make it a nice, easy jog. Now there's a contradiction of words. Easy-Jog...

Anyway, I ran slower than usual, even walked a bit. I found that the heel-pain was slowly slipping away, but my knee continued to throb with every stride. I got back and tried to catch my breath. It was much hotter today. I sized-up the flowing sprinklers imagining how that nice, refreshingly cool, water would feel on my already sweat-drenched skin. If there were no one else standing there with me, I definitely would have found out. In fact, tomorrow, if it's this hot, I just may.

After out warm-up, we stretched, then went to the starting line of our mile. We ran harder and faster today than ever before in sessions. We stopped along the way for wall-sits, bridge jump-ups, push ups and dips, touch-downs, and calf raises (they really burned today!). Then we made our way back to home base at our own, but considerably faster pace.

We finished this morning with lots of ab work. Everything, including my mat, was soaked by the end of class.

It's much harder for me to work-out when it's hot and sticky, like this. I find myself feeling nauseated when I really try to push myself. But I'm learning to push through it. In fact, by the end of our mile, my knee and heel pain were gone.

I'm excited for tomorrow. It's bring-a-friend day and I've invited everyone I can think of. I haven't had any definite yes-es yet but I'm hopeful that at least a few of my friends will decide to GET UP and come join me. I've even offered wake-up calls for those who need it. I wish I could describe how much better I feel when I do GET UP in words, but I just keep telling people that they have to feel the exhiliration for themselves.

I'm really not a "morning person". I'd love to stay in bed, under the covers, especially now that the air-conditioning is on. But I know that if I do, I will not feel my best the rest of the day. I know that every body is different and I know that getting up at 5 AM doesn't work for every one. Boot camp "curriculum" doesn't work for everyone. I understand that. I'm hopeful that my example will, in the least, motivate someone to get off that couch or out of that bed and start getting active.

Even if it means starting out with a five minute down-the-street or driveway stroll, doing a few jumping jacks, joining a gym and walking on the treadmill or the elliptical, swimming, dancing, yoga, ANYTHING!!!!!!!!! YOU'LL FEEL BETTER!!!!!!!!!!! I PROMISE!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, I'm talking to you!!! Get Up!!!! RIGHT NOW! Today is the day!!! You have to make the whole-hearted decision to start somewhere if you want to change your life-style, mind-set and body.

I AM CONQUERING THIS and YOU CAN DO IT too...

So, in the words of Matthew Deprez,

ARE YOU WITH ME?

Day 16

2009-06-22T07:56:00.000-04:00

Whew! The weekend was a good one and I definitely needed some recovery from Friday's session. It was a great work-out but I did find very sore muscles that I didn't even know existed when I woke up on Saturday morning. I did not manage to get any work-outs in over the weekend. My body was fatigued, and I did sleep in both mornings. I know that I feel better when I, at least, get some form of exercise in when I get up in the morning so this is something I need to work on for next weekend. Today is the start of a new week so I'm not going to kick myself for weekend mistakes. What's done is done, and I'll leave the weekend in the past.

Today, I woke up before the alarm and layed in bed until it went off. I did linger sitting on the edge of the bed for a minute before actually getting up, but managed to get up with very little effort which really surprised me. I brushed my teeth, ate my oatmeal, drank some water, put my ponytail in and out the door I went.

I arrived a few minutes early and although my body was still pretty tired, I was really excited for today's work-out. We warmed up with our usual run. The sky was amazing this morning. It was baby blue with a few Clorox-bright, white clouds. The clouds were outlined with the most beautiful shade of electric salmon-orange I've ever seen. There was a soft purple mist grazing the trees in the distance. I'm truly appreciating every sunrise. They are gifts for me, personal paintings for me to enjoy, and I need to thank Him for every single one. The river was very high and I noticed many more ducks than usual. It was sticky and hot and the air was heavy as I pushed myself to "keep running" until I returned to "home base".

Rob informed us that this would be an endurance day and that we would be doing an obstacle course at full-speed until the last 15 minutes which would entail weights and core work. After a bit of stretching, we were off!!! We did push-ups, dips, squats, lunges, rev. crunches, jogging, a type of high heart-rate skipping that I don't think I've ever done before, shuffles, resistance pushes and pulls, and tricep-focused push ups. I completed the course 3 times and finished very strong today! Other than during the walking lunges, which I just can't seem to get the hang of the proper form on, I didn't find myself thinking any negative thoughts. Just the words, "Strength, Power, Endurance, Persistence" kept running through my head. I still hate sweating but there is something empowering about doing push-ups and feeling the sweat dripping from your brow and the tip of your nose and watching it fall to a small puddle on the ground below.

We finished with military presses, rows, curls, push-ups (Yes, mine were "real"!) and a few other arm/back exercises before moving on to abs and core.

Can't wait til tomorrow and I'm looking forward to Thursday's reassessment. I'm a little bit nervous but I know that I have accomplished things that I never thought I would so I'm hopeful that my "scores" will show that I'm improving in strength and endurance. I have to be honest so I can't say that I don't even care about that "number" or that I'm not even thinking about it. Of course I hope that it's gone down!!! But I continually remind myself every day, many times throughout the day, that "it's not about that". That this journey is about ME, my whole self, and HOW I FEEL, and today I FEEL ENERGIZED, POWERFUL, and STRONG!!!

Day 15

2009-06-19T07:13:00.000-04:00

This morning, I awoke to a roaring, rumbling thunderstorm. The rain was pouring down and I could see quick flashes of lightning out my bedroom window. I knew that if I didn't get up before my fingers found the alarm clock that I was not going to make it to Bootcamp today.

So I had to make a decision. "Do I lay here and enjoy the storm snuggled tight under my covers?" or "Do I drag myself out of bed even though every fiber of my being is giving me every possible excuse not to?" The thoughts flowed as fast as the rain was coming down outside, "GET UP, GET UP, You're just going to feel bad later if you give in to this momentary desire, Nagging, nagging, GET UP!!!! Don't you dare touch that button...No you won't do it tomorrow, right now is the time, TODAY, Wendy, Come on, You Can Do this!!!!"

And my feet hit the floor. Teeth, ponytail, breakfast, out the door.

The rain had slowed down quite a bit by the time I reached Rob's office building but it was still quite breezy and misting.

I wondered what we'd be doing today, fearful and dreading a repeat of the sprints and running that we did earlier this week. After a few minutes, Rob informed us that we'd be working in his studio today. "Whew". Although I didn't know what was to come, I knew that it had to be better than running.

Stephanie, Rob's assistant, took us upstairs, the 7th floor, to the Studio. When we walked inside, it was a complete gym set-up. I walked through the first room which seemed to have every piece of work-out equipment imaginable, treadmills, ellipticals, free weights, medicine balls, kettle bells and mats lined the edges of the floors. Then we walked into the Inner Sanctum. Wooden constructed "boxes", a fan, more weights, and one window. Bright orange posts (pillars, maybe) with some type of tow-strap apparatuses attached to them, motivational Marine posters and pictures, a Marine Corps flag, an American Flag...

We all looked around and wondered what we'd gotten ourselves into for the day. My thought were, "I'm sure that Rob painted these pillars orange and chose bright blue floor mats to off-set the feeling of being in a torture chamber, or in the least, a dungeon."

Anyway, we stretched, did some step-ups to get our heart-rate going and then we found out what those "tow-straps" were.

T R X

We used the straps in a variety of ways, using the resistance of our own body weight to complete a series of exercises that worked every major muscle group from legs to neck and shoulders. The hardest part of the work-out for me was the core work. Being on all-fours and hearing the directions "Get into the stirrups..." I couldn't see very many faces but I did make eye contact with one other person and lets just say that we definitely hesitated for more than a second before getting into this very compromising position. I don't know about what other people were thinking during the core exercise portion of our work-out but I know that I was thinking about. What do the letters TRX really stand for? Knees to chest, in plank position, T-Torment? Torture? Knees to each side still in plank position, R- Ripping? Rate of sweat droplets falling from my forehead? Then legs swinging side to side, still in plank position, X X-treme? X-cessive?

This was a very challenging, new way to push my body to the limit! Just about the time I had reached my fatigue level max, I heard the words, "That's it. Good job. We're done."

6:30 already? Even though it was a really tough session, it went by really fast. And I made it!!!

Week 3 down, only one week to go in this month of Boot Camp. I'm excited to see if I've improved in my scores next week. I definitely feel like I have. I still look forward to every morning and I'm 100% sure if I can manage to come up with the money every month that I will continue with Boot Camp. It's really helping me establish good daily routines and habits for myself. Honestly, I'm pretty sure that if I wouldn't have had the accountability of someone knowing that I didn't show up today, I probably would have stayed in bed this morning, I guess that's how I know I'm not ready to do this on my own yet.

But I DID GET UP and from where I'm sitting, the sky might still be a bit cloudy and gray but I know that the sun breaking through!!!

In case you're wondering, Yes, it was a metaphor...

Day 14

2009-06-18T07:27:00.001-04:00

It's amazing how much different you feel after a good night's restful sleep. I'm realizing through this experience that my body needs at least 6 good hours to recharge for the day ahead and if I don't get that, I'm more likely to be tired, depressed, lethargic, and grumpy (sorry, Chad). Last night, I hit my pillow hard and got a full six hours. I woke up this morning to the alarm and immediately got up, got myself ready, ate a good breakfast and headed out the door.

When I got to the park, we did our usual running warm-up and I made it through without any challenges. It seems to be getting increasingly hotter and more humid in the mornings which I don't love because of the sweat factor. But surprisingly, I think this air temperature may be a little easier on my lungs.

We did an obstacle course today complete with LOTS of upper body work, more reps than usual of push-ups, dips, weight work, and resistance bands. We did lunges, jump-rope (I think I'm FINALLY getting the hang of it!), rev. crunches, hopscotch hoops, and more running. I started and finished very strong, completing each and every station to the fullest of my physical ability.

This IS ME. I AM transforming into the woman I have always wanted to be. RRRRRRRarrr...

Day 13

2009-06-17T07:10:00.000-04:00

Had a restless night due to circumstances beyond my control. Estimated sleep time: 2, maybe 3 hours. Snooze button hit twice and rain tapping at my window...

This morning was probably the toughest one to get out of bed yet. I tried to put on a smile and be excited for the morning but my heart was definitely still in bed.

When I arrived, I found out that we were going to be doing running and sprints. I took a deep breath, actually several, put on my best persevering face and reminded myself that this is only one Hour and that I can do it.

We did four sets of walking, jogging, running, sprinting. This was the most brutal class yet for me. I wholeheartedly prayed, pleaded, for strength and help today. Towards the end of our fourth set, I began to feel sick. After the set, I still felt physically sick and began to look for the best place to "relieve my discomfort". I stood outside in the rain for a few minutes tucked away from the rest of the group as to not embarrass myself completely or make anyone else sick. Waiting, wondering, focusing, waiting...trying to cool off which the rain really helped with. I was surprised that my body recovered after a few minutes without losing what little I had eaten (no carbs or protein, bad choice!) before leaving the house.

I took some more deep breaths and headed back inside. We finished the class with weights, push-ups, crunches, and a few other core exercises. I was hopeful that the "twinge" would go away and I tried to push through the best that I could. I really wanted to get the best work-out for me and it sucked (pardon the lack of better phrasing, but it really did) that every time I tried to really push myself after that, the "twinge" would turn into more of a "pounding".

I finished a bit less strong than what I would've liked but I did finish.

Tonight, I will be going to bed early and tomorrow I will be getting up in time to eat a proper balanced breakfast before heading out the door.

As I'm sitting here writing this, I am really encouraged and proud of myself that I didn't "give in" to the physical and mental desire to stay in bed. Even though the class was killer today, I DID IT. I actually don't feel depressed that I wasn't "G.I. Jane" (not that that is what I'm shooting for... And besides, didn't Demi have to shave her head? Not in a million years! Oops, rambling once again...).

Anyway...

Today, I feel accomplished that I did my best and that I will get up tomorrow and the next day, and the next day, and the next. And I WILL continue to do MY BEST with all that is within ME as I continue to get stronger, healthier, and press on to be the best ME that I CAN.

Day 12

2009-06-16T07:04:00.001-04:00

Last night, work ended a bit earlier than what I had planned so I decided to treat myself to a little run. I didn't go far. I ran/walked for about a half-hour. It was nice to be able to tame my frustration of circumstances of the day by exercising rather than reaching for whatever vice was nearest.

This morning, I woke up and took time getting myself together. Teeth brushed, ponytail, and oatmeal this morning instead of the usual out-the-door almonds and banana. It was a nice change of pace.

Then I decided to say "hello" to an "old friend". I stepped on the scale hoping for a nice surprise. Over the weekend, I was able to purchase a couple new things, one being something prettier and a size smaller than what I typically buy. They don't make many racy, lacey, pretty things is my usual size, hmmm, I wonder why? I wonder if it's because in the lingerie manufacturing business monopolized by men, I might add, (sorry, guys, no offense, please) the mindset is that only deserving girls get to feel sexy? Curvy girls (FAT CHICKS, two words that instantly gush anger and disgust through my veins) don't get the privilege? Don't they realize that labeling us just makes the cycle of depression and poor self-image continue? That has got to change!!! (Sorry, I'll step down from my soapbox now...) Anyway, to get back to my original story, I was pretty sure I must have lost at least a few pounds, right? Well, I looked down and there it was, a number, just a number, but it was higher than what I was hoping for. My heart sank and I felt tears welling up in my tired eyes. Even though I've been telling myself (and others) that it's about how I "feel" and being "empowered to do more, go farther, etc...", I felt instant discouragement, sad-ness, defeat. "You are NOT defined by what you weigh." Those words kept flooding my mind. I know this!!! But even so, somehow that "number" changes me. My attitude, my confidence, my whole being. I drove to the park sobered, quiet, but still determined.

I share this because I want others to know that "being a slave to the scale" is NOT a good thing. It's WRONG to view yourself by the world's standards. We are all made in God's image and we should strive to be the best representation of Him to those around us and although I do believe that outward appearance and physical health plays a small role in that, how we show His love daily to others, speaks LOUD and CLEAR. And, what we need to recognize is that we are all beautiful because He made us that way and even if we fall short of what the world says we should look like, He will forever welcome us with open arms. This is a VERY, VERY, hard concept for me to grasp. And believing it in my soul is what I really need to work on.

Anyway, this is not a blog meant to bring anyone down including myself. But I thought I needed to share that in case anyone else feels the same way or struggles with the same thing.

When we arrived, we ran for our warm-up and it was interesting that the scale came up. And I didn't bring it up. One of the "campers" that has been working with Rob for a number of months shared with me that when she did her re-assessment the first camp, she had also put on weight and had actually gained inches in a few areas (and that she had walked away from that day's session tears). She encouraged me, though, reminding me that she has actually lost several sizes and is able to do more and more every camp. I needed to hear that this morning and it really helped change my attitude.

"I will focus on how I feel, I will focus on how I feel, I will focus on how I feel, I will focus on how I FEEL, I WILL FOCUS ON HOW I FEEL!!!!!!!!"

Okay, Okay, so here's what we did today:

Warmed up with a run (which I may say I did without walking), did many lunges, pushes and pulls, resistance pulls, push-ups, leg-ups, squats, lots of core work and strength stuff. I kept a good attitude and resolved to finish every exercise, every rep, with good form and a positive attitude. And I DID!

Tomorrow is a new day, actually, it's still pretty early, so today is a new day. And I WILL press on!

Day 11

2009-06-15T07:02:00.000-04:00

Mondays are difficult. Over the weekend, I don't have a routine or schedule and I haven't developed the discipline to get myself in bed on time on Sunday night. Yesterday was a pretty relaxing day and I have to say, I felt much more tired because I didn't exercises. I did manage to get a short run in on Saturday evening, though.

It took me a few minutes extra this morning to get going but once I was on my way, I was ready to go and couldn't wait to get to the park.

Once I arrived, we did our usual morning jog. I was able to run the whole time today. As I was running, I had time to reflect on the weekend and realized that I did make some bad decisions as far as food choices. But today is a new day and I'm not looking back. The sky was absolutely stunning in shades of purple, periwinkle and soft gray. Rob commented on the perfect half-moon. I did notice during our run that it felt much warmer today. I prefer the briskness but still, it was beautiful.

After the warm-up, we did an obstacle course complete with lunges, sprints, reverse crunches, dips, push-ups (I even did some "real" ones today!), squats, dips, resistance running, hopscotch jumps, and of course my personal favorite, STAR JUMPS. After the course, we did quite a bit of core work (lots of sweating today which I really don't enjoy, but I know it means I was working extra hard) before finally stretching.

I'm full of energy and ready to face the week ahead and whatever challenges may come my way!!!

Day 10

2009-06-12T07:22:00.001-04:00

Today was reallllllly tough getting up. I hit the snooze and layed there for a few minutes even after the second alarm went off. My body was sore and tired but I knew I had to get up. I didn't think about not going but had to assert some major effort to get my body to do what my mind knew it needed to. Feet hit the floor, half-hearted ponytail, shoes on slowly, then out the door.

I was tired on the way downtown but remained focused on the new day and the challenge ahead of me. 10 minutes is just about the right amount of time for a good attitude adjustment.

Warmed up with a good, steady run and some not-quite-long-enough stretches. We were numbered off and formed teams. We did a 2 person team relay today. Before this class, I would not have considered myself a competitive person and I guess even now, it's not about the "winning" but about using everything that is within me to do better than I did last time and to try to motivate others to do the same. We ran with ammo cans, jumped rope, did death jumps (my new name for star jumps), dips, push-ups, presses, lunges, and medicine ball tosses (definitely not our best leg of the race). Amy and I stayed together and encouraged each other throughout the race and although we didn't come in first, we finished strong!

I'm looking forward to but anxious about Monday. I'm still fearful of falling back into old habits and until that fear is gone, I plan on sticking with this. This is the first time EVER that I've made it 2 weeks without having any self-doubt or "secret sabotage". I KNOW that I can continue this. Last Monday was a really tough morning for me so I don't plan on taking the weekend "off", just maybe taking it a little easier. 2 weeks down, 2 weeks to go, I'm half way through my first boot camp!!!

Day 9

2009-06-11T07:26:00.000-04:00

Stayed up wayyyyyyyyyy too late but no time for snooze button today. The alarm went off and my feet hit the floor. No grumping or groaning, just excitement brewing.

Today was a "heavy" day. I did manage to run the entire time on our warm up which is a HUGE achievement for me (Thanks, Annie, for the motivation!). We did lots of jumping rope (still not my favorite thing but I'm getting better at it), worked with 25 lb. military ammo packs (I think that's what he said they were?) in various lifts, push-ups and running exercises, did lots of arms and medicine ball. We finished up with a little bit of core work.

I FEEL AMAZING!!!!!!!!!! My body hasn't changed a whole lot but my outlook and attitude have. I think for me, right now, that's the most important thing.

Now I just have to find a new source of income to help me cover these sessions because I've found a new love for pushing myself harder everyday and NOTHING is gonna stop me now...

Day 8

2009-06-10T07:17:00.000-04:00

This morning, the alarm went off and I hit that snooze button and rolled over. This time, I actually fell back asleep, though. 9 minutes? It felt like 9 seconds!!! But after that, I did get up, get myself ready and headed out the door.

We started with a little bit of stretching then we were off. We made our way through Downtown GR with many stops along our run. We did dips, lunging up and running backwards on the Indian Mounds (which is REALLY challenging when you're not quite awake yet, I might add), steps, squat jumps (like these about as much as Star Jumps), push-ups, and a few other exercises before sprinting up-hill by Devos place then running back to the park. I'm still struggling with running and I can't say it's getting easier but I'm at least getting use to it.

I'm really enjoying the fact that Rob switches it up every day and that we don't ever know what's coming next. The anticipation of what's ahead helps keep my energy and attitude up. I think not knowing until it's time to start the next task allows me no time to dread it.

We finished with a little bit of Core work and then I had my physical stats done.

That was, well, humbling, to say the least. We measured flexibility, inches, weight and percentage of body fat. I have known where I am on the scale for some time now so that was no surprise. But waiting to have someone squeeze and measure the fat content on your thighs, tummy and arms, well lets just say, there were visions of farmers checking out the "healthiness of the livestock" going through my head. I know that wasn't the intent and it wasn't presented that way at all, still, I can't help the thoughts that run through my mind so I might as well share them. I don't really know where I'm at in terms of percentage of fat because Rob hasn't explained that yet or loaded it into the website but I'm pretty sure if I were one of those animals, I might be Sunday dinner.

Anyway, all in all, I'm having a great, challenging time and enjoying the way I feel. Daily, I'm choosing to make better, healthier food choices and spending less time doing things that are not beneficial to me.

I AM ready for this day and I AM excited for tomorrow!!!

Day 7

2009-06-09T07:11:00.000-04:00

This morning, I woke up at 4:45, before the alarm went off. I wondered if it would be better to just get up but I decided to stay in bed snuggled in my covers for just a few more minutes. I didn't fall back asleep though. I was excited to see what we would be doing this morning.

After the alarm went off, I got right up, got myself ready and headed out the door. I could feel the excitement welling up inside me. I know, I couldn't believe it either. I woke up with the desire to do better today and it changed my outlook on the morning. I'll need to remind myself of this later this week, I'm sure.

When I arrived, it was dark and misty outside. Rob informed us that this would be an endurance day so my mind immediately shifted to running, ugh! We warmed up with our usual jog. I ran across the river a few times and down by the fisherman and waterfall. It's amazing how close those ducks get to the waterfall but don't get pulled in. After we returned, I was happy to find out that we'd be doing an obstacle course and not just running.

We did push-ups, running, dips, shuffles, steam-engines, resistance pushes and pulls, hoops, and lots of arm exercises today. We finished with some ab and core work. At the end, we did partner-assisted stretching and as we did, there was a refreshing, cool breeze provided just for me (I'm sure of it) as a reward for my hard work.

Today was tough but I resolved to start and finish strong which is exactly what I did. I feel accomplished, strong and ready for the day. As a matter of fact, I'm ready for tomorrow too...

Day 6

2009-06-08T07:32:00.000-04:00

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down...

I do have to say that this morning, starting out was tough. I didn't want to get up out of my comfy bed with the sound of the rain tapping on my window but after one push of the snooze button, I managed to get my lazy body up. Teeth brushed, clothes on, ponytail and ready to go.

We headed over to the parking lot again and began by jogging to warm up. It was a slow, but steady jog/walk for me today. Even though I knew I needed to get going, my body felt very tired after the weekend. I did manage to squeeze in a bike ride on Saturday and we had great fun playing baseball as a family, something we've never done before. I felt good knowing that my family is starting to make a move towards an active lifestyle.

After the jog, we began a circuit, I have to admit, I didn't push myself very hard today. I went through the motions and I did complete each task in it's entirety but I definately could've worked harder. I'm sad that I didn't utilize the valuable time that I had to get the most out of it. I do feel that I got a "good" work-out in but I know I could've done much better.

I'm determined to get a little bit more cardio in somehow today, even if it means stopping at the gym after work for a quick mile.

Tomorrow is another day and a new chance to do my best. I WILL!

Day 5

2009-06-05T07:25:00.000-04:00

I stayed up a bit too late last night so it was difficult to get up and get going. Once my teeth were brushed, and my ponytail in place, I was ready to get to it.

This morning, we began with our usual warm up of running, I ran along the river this morning and once again, took a a few moments to take in my surroundings. Every morning, I can't help but thank the Creator for the blessings he gives me every day. He paints the sky in purples, pinks, oranges and blues that I've never seen before. I love the briskness of the air against my skin during this time of the morning. Today, I saw ducks, birds and a few early mornin' fisherman.

Then we proceeded to do another obstacle course circuit today. Weights, lots of squats and lunges, and Oh yes, my new favorite, " The Star Jump". I thought, "Oh, star jump, that sounds ok, maybe even fun"....Well, it might as well be called the "Jump of Torture" because after ten of them, you feel as if your chest is caving in and your body is screaming through gasping breaths, "STOP, STOP!!! OR YOU WILL SURELY DIE". Ok, so maybe that's a little bit dramatic, but you get the picture. Anyway, I made it through my first week. And I actually think I'm going to try to squeeze in a bike ride and a run over the weekend.

I know that my body hasn't made any significant changes yet but I am happy to have a renewed spirit. I am POWERFUL. I am STRONG. I AM DETERMINED. I CAN do this!

Day 4

2009-06-04T14:01:00.000-04:00

Yes, this morning, again, the snooze button was hit, but I realized that not once, this week, have I even considered not going, for me, that's an accomplishment!

Today, we began the morning with our mile run. I wish that I could say that I love running, but honestly, I loathe it. I did wear my mp3 player though, so at least I had music to motivate each stride. I wasn't able to run the whole way but I did sprint across the homestretch (I love that the homestretch is over the bridge). My time was 11 minutes. I had hoped that it might be closer to the 10 minute mark, but now I have something to shoot for for next time.

Then came the fitness test:

All-in-all, I did ok. My greatest weaknesses were definately in the area of Tricep Dips and Jumping Rope (probably my 2 least favorite activities in the world!!!). I was encouraged that I was able to hold a plank for longer than what I believed I could. I did well in crunches too.

Hmmm, what will we be doing tomorrow? I can't exactly say "I'm excited to see" but I'm definately wondering...

Day 3

2009-06-04T13:33:00.001-04:00

Today, we mapped out our mile course for running and did various excersises along the way. I was sore when I got up this morning and today, I did hit the snooze button, but after I got up, I was excited to see what was in store for us.

This is my post from yesterday on the GR Bootcamp Page:

"Early this morning, as I was "running" across Sixth Street Bridge in the dimness, I gazed down the river (it took me a while to cross). It was so beautiful. Quiet, peaceful, still and serene; words that are not part of my usual vocabulary. I've lived in GR my whole life but I'm always in such a hurry to do this or that or take the kids somewhere or get to or from work or somewhere else that I don't think I've ever in my adult life taken the time to ENJOY this place that I call home. This boot camp is more than just excercise, shedding a few pounds or getting fit. This experience is teaching me the importance of TRULY taking time for ME. Time to reflect, to realize what/Who motivates me, to understand the reasons that I am who I am, and the reasons why I NEED to continue on this journey. The reasons that this needs to be about me, and only ME. I'm so happy that I made this investment of my money and of my time. I can't wait till tomorrow..."

Tomorrow we will have our "Fitness Evaluations". I'm not dreading it but I am not really excited to see how poorly I score in some areas either. I know my endurance isn't great and I know that my upper body is pretty weak, as well. Although I hate running, I'm looking forward to running the mile course on my own so I can see what my time will be.

Boot Camp Day 2

2009-06-04T13:27:00.000-04:00

When we arrived this morning, Rob asked us if anyone was sore. No one responded. He replied "Guess I didn't do my job, then." My immediate thought "Uh-oh". We spent the hour running, doing an obstacle course circuit, and finished up with some "core" work. It wasn't brutal but I will definately be sore tomorrow.

Boot Camp Day 1

2009-06-04T13:19:00.000-04:00

We met our instructor, Rob, and did a little bit of working out. It was raining so we had to go to a covered parking lot instead of staying outside for the whole class. It went really well but I have to wonder if this is it. We did some mild jogging and isolated excersises on each part of the body. I guess it's not really what I expected. Rob informed us that if we were expecting a shouting drill sargeant that we are not in the right place. I guess I'm okay with no shouting but I hope that tomorrow will be a bit more challenging.